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2 Bumps

Is it normal to fight with your spouce all the time while he's deployed?

My husband is currently deployed. We have been together for almost 3 years and this is our 2nd deployment together. He left about 8 months ago and on his r&r we got married. Since he's gone back it seems like every conversation we have all we do is fight. It's always about ridiculous things like him calling at 3:00am or asking me to send pics at a bad time. We talk twice a day every day and i feel like it may be the cause of our fights...that we talk too much and i sorta feel like im unappreciative that i do get to talk to him so often. is this normal? how can i control my anger and not snap at him?

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christey13

Asked by christey13 at 10:19 PM on Apr. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • sorry to hear that. But its maybe the stress you having. To deal with him being so far away and all that. Try to be calm, hes going thru a hard time as well. Hope thing will be better for you!
    LittleBirdFly

    Answer by LittleBirdFly at 10:22 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • Long distances can hurt relationships. My hubby got a new job that requires him to travel some, and next month he will b gone for 3 weeks, we have not been apart for more than a day in the year we have been together. I am kinda worried, but I know he will call me every night and itll b over soon. I guess u should b glad he calls you and maby tell him that u think talking and not getting to see him for so long is painful and maby he has some ideas that might help too. (sounds to me like he really loves you)
    sarahlu

    Answer by sarahlu at 10:33 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • My husband's 2nd deployment we were like this. I think a part of the problem is you are talking too much. He would get mad if I wasn't sitting right next to the computer waiting for an email or for him to sign in to instant messenger. If I missed a phone call he'd be irritated and we'd argue. Being apart sucks, it's hard on any relationship. He needs to learn to respect the fact that your life doesn't stop while he's away and maybe be considerate about the times he does call. If you're talking so much he obviously can control the times he can call you to more reasonable times. Also you need to understand that you don't understand. KWIM? He's probably sooo lonely and depressed and misses you so much that he just wants to hear your voice or see you, whether or not it's a good time for you.
    marine_wife0520

    Answer by marine_wife0520 at 10:38 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • thanks for the help everyone! i really appreciate all the advice hopefully we can work out some sort of schedule to talk at a time that works for both of us. Im finally realizing how hard being away from each other is on both of us and how emotional and stressed we both really are. almost done with this deployment though so hopefully when he gets back things can go back to normal!!
    christey13

    Comment by christey13 (original poster) at 10:43 PM on Apr. 12, 2011

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