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How can I have better communication with my 9 year old son?

At school he talks and communicates with everyone very well; but when he is here at home it is like pulling teeth to try and get him to talk to us and open up.

 
Christmaslver68

Asked by Christmaslver68 at 6:37 AM on Apr. 11, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 47 (254,089 Credits)
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Answers (4)
  • One thing I have heard of is playing a "game" where the parent talks about something then it's the child's turn. The parent controls the topics like something that made me laugh today, something that made me sad today, something I did today that made me feel good about myself.......there are tons of possibilities.  Another thing I have heard of is telling the best and worst thing about your day. And, again, the parent starts. These can be done around the dinner table, have a special time before bed, or after dinner. Make it part of your routine and the child can say anything and not get in trouble or be judged for it.    Just ideas........GL

    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:31 AM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • I have a 10 year old boy. When I know something is bothering him and doesn't want to talk, I spend some quiet time with him alone. It seems to make him open up a bit. I take him for a slice of pizza. You'd be surprised how much will come out of his mouth. Most important, don't force him to talk about things he doesn't want to talk about, but pose questions... that usually helps. Good luck.
    Chiqui52

    Answer by Chiqui52 at 8:39 AM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • I have twin 10 year old boys. Not every night but from time to time we will play "High and Low" I ask What was your high(best part) of the day what was the low (worst part) of the day. At first I would always start with my own high and low now they are more free to answer. I always try to be a "safe ear". I don't over react to things they did wrong or what was done to them. We just talk about the cause and effect of their or others behaviors. I tell them all the time you can choose your actions but not the consequence. I am not a push over and sometimes too much of a disciplinarian but when we are talking that's what we are doing just talking. So what was your high and low of the day? :)

    SueAnd2

    Answer by SueAnd2 at 3:46 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • thanks
    Christmaslver68

    Comment by Christmaslver68 (original poster) at 8:32 AM on Apr. 11, 2011

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