Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

What to do?

So, my family lives in a different state and right now I am living with my boyfriend and where his family lives. We have a baby together and our baby is only a couple months old. Our relationship isnt working out and I want to move back to the state that my family lives with my baby. My question is, is it possible for me to move and take our baby with me, even though my bf is "head of household" I dont have a job but I know my family would help me financially until I get on my feet. Could I legally take my baby with me and leave my bf here? My family lives in the next state over and it is only a couple hours away.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:32 PM on Apr. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • You have the right to take your baby anywhere you please. Unless you have a court issued child/parent agreement that holds you in your current state, there is nothing to stop you.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 1:35 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • As long as you inform him of your location, and let him know he can come visit at any time I don't see any reason why you can't move back home.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 1:39 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • Your BF would have to go through the courts and get a judges order to keep you with him and the baby. Even then he can only TRY and get the baby from you. Take your baby where You want if there is no court order, and if he threatens to get one? SO WHAT? in the mean time you move where you need to and expect to get served with orders to report for court. Dadd's are entitled to visitation and seeing as he is not the custodial parent HE is responsible for the drive there and back to get his visitation. DONT let him have the baby for visitation before a judge orders it as He can keep the baby from You then. Then you would have to go to court.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 1:42 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • If you have his permission you can without going to court. You can also call your local Domestic Violence Shelter and ask. I know he's not abusing you but they know your state laws. In my state we only have to tell the other parent that we are taking them across the state line. In some you can't go without written permission. Just find out your state laws. You could also try www.womenslaw.org then link to KNOW THE LAWS> find your state and see if it tells you there.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:11 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • yes, you can definitely go- especially since you guys aren't married. i would be one step ahead though and file for child support so he doesn't take you to court later. do research on "kidnapping" though- seriously, because the charges surrounding that are different in different states. not saying what you're doing could be considered kidnapping, but just saying double check. i took my abusive ex to court, and they added a kidnapping charge (mind you, it was not your standard case of kidnapping). anyway, definitely leave if you feel that's best, "head of household" doesn't mean anything. do some research first though, and don't give him a heads up while you're doing that. good luck.
    lexi8622

    Answer by lexi8622 at 5:22 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • You pack up that baby and yourself and you go home. And hell be damned with what he chooses to do. If you can put him off for 3 to 6 months while your residency is set then he will have to come to your state to take you to court (CHECK WITH AN ATTY -- but this is the way it worked when *I* went thru this same thing) And Lexi is spot on accurate when she told you to NOT let him privy to what you're up to.
    He will have the burden of establishing paternity and he will be expected to pay and be liable for child support once he does that - depending on the answer to this --- IS HIS NAME ON THE BABY'S BIRTH CERTIFICATE and did he sign the birth certificate? (because that can be used as a proclamation of paternity in many courts).
    AND DON'T TAKE ANY OF OUR ADVICE AS LEGAL ADVICE... YOU NEED A PROPER ATTY FOR LEGAL MATTERS.
    ShelbyShareAlot

    Answer by ShelbyShareAlot at 8:01 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

  • yes. you have the right since you aren't married. according to most states the father has no rights over the child unless the mother gives her rights away. if you want to leave and go home to your family go ahead. good luck.
    xavierlogan09

    Answer by xavierlogan09 at 9:01 PM on Apr. 11, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.