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2 Bumps

How have your marriages been affected by having children?

I have two children and I've noticed a big difference in my marriage. I wanted to know how your marriages have been affected. Also what have you done to help get your marriage back on tract?

 
Les38

Asked by Les38 at 11:44 AM on Apr. 12, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 3 (19 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I think our child has had an impact in good and bad ways. On the good side, we now share this amazing love for our child, we can talk about her for hours, we would do anything for her, and we do spend a lot of time together as a family. When it was just the two of us we ate in front of the tv and now we sit down to dinner, and go on outings together like the zoo, etc. But on the other hand we definitely lose our patience with each other more when things get stressful or occasionally disagree over parenting strategies. And we have to really make an effort to have quality alone time. We get alone time every night once the DD is in bed but it's really easy to just plop down in front of the tv (after we do dishes, laundry, etc) and zone out rather than trying to connect with each other. I think now that we have a child it takes more effort to stay connected, find time and energy for intimacy, but we are also bonded as parents now.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 4:55 PM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • Our children just made our marriage and love grow deeper. Kids can be tough, but they are fun as well. We make time for each other. We stay up an hour or two after we put our girls to bed to talk and watch a movie.
    MKSers

    Answer by MKSers at 11:57 AM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • in loveHonestly, DH and I Get closer with every child! ( 5 so far) And we love family time! But we always also make sure to have 1 day a month for just us!

    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 1:01 PM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • It crashed and burned because he wasn't willing to accept that all of my attention could no longer be on him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:46 AM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • Having our daughter has changed our marriage/relationship in many ways. We no longer have time for just hanging out and enjoying each other's company. We don't go anywhere alone. We don't sit and cuddle and watch movies anymore. We don't really have time for things of an intimate nature any more. His work schedule, going back to school part time and having a 2 1/2 year old that demands all my attention all are first priorities. Basically since having my daughter, we are just sharing the same house and an occasional meal.
    Kelly502

    Answer by Kelly502 at 11:50 AM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • My kids made my marriage MUCH stronger. We have so much more in common due to our kids. Both of us want the best for them and we work hard to achieve that. Kids really help bring it all together.
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 11:50 AM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • Having kids made him not trust me anymore saying I got pregnant to steal from him.
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 11:54 AM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • Yes.. it has - our son was a very difficult infant to say it lightly- we had been together for 11 years before having him and rarely fought and once dealing with the difficulties of our sons issues, we battled often, that is still our only battle is when it comes to our apparently opposite views on raising our son and disciplining him, even though we thought we had talked and agreed in all areas BEFORE having him.. we are currently working very hard on keeping a great relationship but I do notice more awkward silences unless we are talking about Max lol!~
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:55 AM on Apr. 12, 2011

  • a lot less time together. we have a 4yr old and 14month old both girls and 1 due in Sept. We also have full custody of his 11 yr old girl which with school and the way she acts puts a lot of stress on me (i stay at home he works) therefore I put stress on him (not meaning too) We do have family time which is usually fun. We dont watch movies together anymore (i fall asleep within the 1st 5min lo) I go to bed by 9 he comes to bed around 11. Less sex and cuddling. But i figure once they are all a least 5 we will go on a weekend vacation just me and him.
    tomsjennabean

    Answer by tomsjennabean at 2:33 PM on Apr. 12, 2011