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2 Bumps

Would you confront a past bully?

my son's karate instrustor's wife (who is also an instructor) has always looked so familiar to me. i just now realized how i know her. I believe she and two other girls jumped me when i was in 6th grade. i had this flash back when i was putting my make up on. She was 2 grades ahead of me. She still looks the same, her name is the same as the girl, i'm just thinking of asking her if she lived in the subdivision back then and if she went to that middle school. should i? and if it is her should i confront her? what would you say? i'm just thinking of saying something like "yeah, you seem to have changed a lot." idk.

Answer Question
 
shay1130

Asked by shay1130 at 8:56 AM on Apr. 13, 2011 in Just for Fun

Level 27 (32,809 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Why would you confront her for something from childhood? Are you looking for an apology? or to make her feel bad? If its the only way you can let go of something from your past just ask the woman. It is possible she is not that same person, or it's even possible she is a bigger bully now than when you were in school.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 8:59 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • no, i'm just curious if its her. thats all. we have actually started being quite friendly and i kinda want to know if its her
    shay1130

    Comment by shay1130 (original poster) at 9:01 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • I would honestly ask her - "Were you that mean girl who beat me up in 6th grade?" I'd be honest about it. I bet she feels like crap about it now that she is all grown up & is a mother...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:01 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • I'm sure she knows who you are....

    I see nothing wrong with confronting her. Getting jumped is a traumatic experience, no matter what age you are. If you have the chance too, i would bring it up. I would not be searching for an apology or sympathy, but i would like her to know that the experience she gave me SUCKED. Maybe she can teach her kids better than her parents taught her...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:04 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • I agree with samurai_chica
    CollegeMommy121

    Answer by CollegeMommy121 at 9:13 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • yeah, i'm thinking maybe i will wait until we are a little closer then i will tell her. I don't want it to sound like i'm looking for an apology
    shay1130

    Comment by shay1130 (original poster) at 9:16 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • I wouldn't confront her, I would ask her. If it is you can quickly relive the moment, laugh and move on. She does probably know who you are.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 9:16 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • For me, I wouldnt confront someone and tell them how it made me feel because I wouldnt them to know that they hurt me. I would probably say something crappy to her though, lol. I dont know if that approach would be the best approach though.
    smushy79

    Answer by smushy79 at 9:18 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • I'd take it a step at a time. Find out if it is indeed her. Then maybe give yourself a break and talk with her about it later. If I were in your place I'd be afraid of rushing into things.
    jmpj8107

    Answer by jmpj8107 at 9:30 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

  • How do you know she isn't still a bully? After all, she is a karate instructor.
    Syphon

    Answer by Syphon at 10:06 AM on Apr. 13, 2011

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