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Nervous!! Need support badly!!

Next Wednesday I have a custody battle court date. My ex actually has a decent lawyer this time, lol My lawyer is better of course LOL and I know that for a fact, but I nervous bc my lawyer told me that my ex's lawye is a complete jackass. Like I guess one time when they were in court together. My lawyer was defending the wife/mother and my ex's lawyer was defending the husband/ father. Well the wife wanted to move out of state & was trying to get it approved by the courts, well my ex's lawyer said "The home should be in whatever state the mother dropped her pants in." OMG! WTF ?? I guess he gets held in contempt all the time for being rude like that. I'm super sensitive. My ex is trying to prove me as an unfit mother for the 2nd time :( He is gonna lose, but that's not the point. I'm scared he's gonna be rude to me. My lawyer said he will do what he can to keep his lawyer from being like that with me, but at some moments he might not be able to. I will cry & look like a completely idiot!! If I cry, will that make me look guilty like I am trying to hide that I am a bad mom or something ? lol Ugh!! I can't sleep thinkin about it today and its basically a week away! :(

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:50 AM on Apr. 14, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I think crying as long as it's not hysterical is an acceptable response. I think as long as you don't get visibly angry and act on that anger than you will be fine. It sounds to me like the lawyer is trying to goad you into acting bad, it's probobly the best argument he can come up with! Lol! You sound like you're alot smarter than that!!! Hang in there, you can do this!
    Ms.Gwen

    Answer by Ms.Gwen at 8:19 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • I think that the judge has seen your exs lawyers tricks. I don't think he will be fooled by whatever rude comments spill out of your exs lawyers mouth. If you cry, the judge will see how emotional you are, that's a good thing, it means you are passionate, it means you are caring, it means you have a soul. I would walk into court next week, hold you head high, and thank the judge when he sides with you! Don't worry, everything will turn out fine!!!
    BabyBugsmama

    Answer by BabyBugsmama at 1:56 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Hugs !! "Worrying is like a rocking chair. it goves you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere". One of my favorites. :-) It is times like these when we future trip to the fear of the unknown. Stay in this moment and keep busy. No matter what you do, you just have to go through this and get to the other side. Stay positive, control your thoughts and don't feed negative, fearful ones- it won't change anything. Plan something special for after the hearing, it will give you a healthier perspective. Rent a room at a motel with a pool. Then pamper yourself this week, paint nails, get hair done, anything to help "feel" good to counter this stress. Keep your humor up and don't think on next week. Just take things one step at a time and soon it will be over. Yes, attorneys can be ruthless, but that is their job. Don't give it too much credit or power. Just stay focused on what you can do
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 2:14 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Another great coping skills is to " stay out of myself" , when I feel like this, and do things for others. Bake for your neighbors, Write a special letter or thank you notes for people, anything to stay busy, positive and take the power away from future tripping to "next week". Chin up, manderware on and take each day . "This too shall pass".
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 2:20 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Ok thank you soooo much for your advice & support. I really appreciate it!! :)

    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:58 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Don't feel bad if you cry. Someone tearing you down in a public place like that can make you cry. It would make you look FAR from guilty and make his lawyer look like a hurtful ass. That is so innapropriate.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 2:07 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Thats what I was thinking. Like what does it make him feel good to make a woman cry ? lol
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:09 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Thanks so much for your positive thoughts :) I'm def going to get pamper myself and maybe buy a new outfit to wear there to help make me feel better about the day overall ? Like I look more presentable ? lol Thanks again
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:20 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • I hate to cry, so if I cry, I will def not be a hysterical mess! lol I'm the type to keep wipping my tears so no one sees them. LOL I prefer to cry in private. Oh yeah, I def won't be getting angry or acting out on my anger if I do get angry. I'm soooo not like that. I won't let my anger get the best of me when my baby is on the line. ya know ???

    Thanks again for all your support!!!!!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:37 AM on Apr. 14, 2011

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