Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Why should a person forgive someone who isn't sorry?

Some people, mostly Christians, tell others that they need to forgive people even though the offending party is not at all sorry for the offense they committed against them.

I do not personally feel the need to forgive a person who will likely victimize me again or is not sorry for what they did. This includes not taking responsibility for the damages they have done.

My question is why should a person forgive the unrepentant?

 
CallMeAngie

Asked by CallMeAngie at 1:48 PM on Apr. 14, 2011 in Relationships

Level 17 (3,297 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • I do not follow any religious dogmas. I have a strong sense of what is fair and equitable and I am usually spot on with my assessments. I think many people use forgiveness as a source of closure for themselves. Well you don't need symbolism just eliminate the S.O.B. physically and mentally as best possible. I personally have found that being active, being generous to the the less fortunate and doing well for oneself and those that matter to us is being proactive in your own healing process. I hope I helped.
    Gaily.Daily

    Answer by Gaily.Daily at 4:17 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Forgive, don't forget. you can forgive them but that doesn't mean you need to let them back into that same place of your life.. instead they can be that person you say hello to in passing. Forgiveness never means forgetfulness
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 1:51 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Forgiveness is not for the person being forgiven, it's for the person doing the forgiving....alot of times we're holding onto that issue so hard that it's hurting us more then the person who we are angry with....forgiving them will give us peace
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 1:52 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Forgiveness isnt so much for the person being forgiven, as it is for the person forgiving... just do it for yourself, for YOUR sanity. who cares about them if they arent sorry!! lol
    sarahlu

    Answer by sarahlu at 1:53 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • so you have peace about it. It really all has to do with you and what is inside of your soul..it has nothing to do with them. Its like "letting go"..releasing it. No longer being angry. Anger and resentment can physically make you sick.
    Momforhealth

    Answer by Momforhealth at 1:51 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • I do it so i can let it go out of my mind. There is no need to waste mental space on a person who doesn't care in the first place. When you forgive them you do it for personal reasons despit what the other persons thinks
    timbrikaylamom

    Answer by timbrikaylamom at 1:54 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Forgivness is such a powerful gift. It sets YOU free from hate anger bitterness taking revenge. Example my sister stole from me and will not admit it i know it was her 110% I forgave her because I needed to let go of the baggage that came with me being upset with her. Now do i trust her around my money? No i learned shes steals and lies but i forgave her because its money. Now if someone killed my kid that would be something i dont know if i could forgive but i think thats they only thing that i couldnt forgive for.

    whitenena

    Answer by whitenena at 1:57 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • I'm not a very forgiving person when it comes to those who are not sorry or care about what they've done.
    brandy0827

    Answer by brandy0827 at 1:53 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • Only you know what you can handle in your life. call it forgiveness or unforgiveness. Some hide behind this " oh I did her wrong/hurt her but she will forgive me and then its all back to the same thing... AGAIN... I have been used, abused, lied on,talked about, face in the dirt so to speak for all of my life.. and YES... I GREW UP CHURCH OF GOD. Now at 38.... I am DONE getting stepped on. With I intentionally go out to cause harm, or ill will to another.. NOPE. But will I welcome them around me, my family , NOPE. I am a trusting person and now realize that I was just fine BEFORE this person came into my life and will be just fine without them. I deserve caring,respect. only U know your strengths.
    kkbird

    Answer by kkbird at 2:56 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • You can forgive them, but you also learn from mistakes. "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me." And I really believe that.
    yesmaam

    Answer by yesmaam at 1:50 PM on Apr. 14, 2011