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My husband is not that into his kids...my step kids...

He never calls them or wants to pick them up...we have been married for alomst 4 years and they have only come 4 times and they only live an hour and half away...But when they do come he wants me to connected with them , but I feel its hard to connect because I do not know them yet..Its not that I do want to , I dont know what the prob is...I ask him to pick them up all the time, but he always finds a reason not to...does any one else go through this..or can someone help me get passed the not being able to bond with them?

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momofmonsters27

Asked by momofmonsters27 at 3:05 PM on Apr. 14, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 7 (162 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Maybe you could take the initiative and on a 3-day weekend (or any of his weekends) -- surprise him by picking them up and then spend the weekend doing family things? He will regret not being (more) a part of their lives when they are grown and he is an old man -- but then it will be too late.
    BaileysMom476

    Answer by BaileysMom476 at 3:09 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • man oh man, do you already have kids w/him. If not, maybe take that as a warning? I know that's not what you were looking to hear. Just find out what they like to do, how old are they? boys/girls?
    yesmaam

    Answer by yesmaam at 3:10 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • i hate to say this but this is a BIG red flag!!!!! it's understandable for him to not jump right in at first but by this time he should be bonding whith them more i hate say it but if you keep trying things like you say and he doesn't respond he probably never will. i went thru this with a guy i was dating he kept saying it would take time for him to adjust to my son i have him a year then dropped his ass!! my son comes first i am sorry if that sounds harsh but men come and go your kids are your kids forever
    amberpaiz

    Answer by amberpaiz at 3:15 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

  • My mom's ex husband was like this. He never picked up his son to spend time with him and my mom always bought his presents for holidays/birthdays, etc. He also was a very mean person but that's another story. I would say just try to help him understand what this looks like to his kids...they could think that he doesn't want them or love them and that's probably not the case. He just needs to put in a little more effort.
    AmandaJean825

    Answer by AmandaJean825 at 3:25 PM on Apr. 14, 2011

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