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Getting married too soon after a death.

My grandmother died back on Valentines day in 2007 from cancer. Well my grandfather is getting married to this women tomorrow that we just met at Thanksgiving. He is giving us my grandmothers wedding ring, pictures, he gave away her dog and sold his house. He's going on his honeymoon in Hawii. He never went to vacation with my grandmother like that. I honestly haven't seen him happier then he is now but I feel like he is getting rid of my grandmothers memory. Oh yeah and his new wife is going to be buried next to him while my grandmother is on the other side of him. Oh yeah and he is getting married inside a temple so we can't actually go to the wedding. Do you think it's too soon for him to get married? Also do you think it's right for him to be giving all of my Grandmothers belongings away?

 
Eisleysmommy27

Asked by Eisleysmommy27 at 10:17 AM on Apr. 15, 2011 in Relationships

Level 15 (1,971 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I don't feel it is too early for him to be getting married again, it has been 4 yrs. My grandmother starting dating about a yr after my granddaddy passed...and I know she still loves him but she knows he would have wanted her to move on. It was something they talked about before he passed, they both had given each others blessing to move on and maybe your grandparents had that too. About him giving everything of your grandmother's away, atleast this way it is with you and your family staying in the family and this new woman won't be able to keep it from you in the event something happens to your Grandpa. They are things that mean more to you than they ever would to the new woman in his life. I hope this helps, I know it is hard to see him with someone new, but if he is happy, that should be all that matters.
    sdks2011

    Answer by sdks2011 at 10:26 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • Its been 4 years since your grandmother died. It isn't too soon. Men at that age don't usually survive long without another mate. Wish him luck, he's not getting rid of your grandmother's memory, he's respecting his new wife by taking in the tangibles of your grandmother out. That's not getting rid of the memory - those live on through you, in his mind, etc.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 10:20 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • This is a tough one because of how it makes those closest to him feel, but it's 2011...it's been 4 years hun. I think that's a reasonable time for him to move on and I would be happy that he's actually found someone to move on with. Not to sound callous, but he's your grandfather...how much time does he really have left? Is it really fair to begrudge him his happiness?
    SpiffySnaps

    Answer by SpiffySnaps at 10:21 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • Yes i think it is it may hurt you but he's moving on and he's happy and i think your grandmother would've wanted him to be happy.He's probably not that young either so him enjoy his last few years especially after losing his wife may have been a wake up call thathe needed to do things like vacation with a woman he loves etc.
    rhonda111787

    Answer by rhonda111787 at 10:22 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • He deserves to be happy. It's hard to see him move on but u want the best for him. He probably realizes u need to enjoy ur partner while u can still travel. Maybe they never traveled be because 1) there were kids, 2) not in the budget 3) they kept putting it off. Also her things aren't what remind us of ppl. It's their memory. The times we spent with them.
    Besides 4 yrs is long enough to move on.
    Vero0724

    Answer by Vero0724 at 10:22 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • I think he is looking at it as "you only live once and why die alone" His life is shorter and in older age people are more settled into who they are instead of who they want to be. Be happy for him and be grateful he gave you things that mean a lot to you.. I would be more worried if he had thrown those things away. The memory of your grandmother might be too heartbreaking for him right now. Just offer him your love and support
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:23 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • I think he deserves to be happy and you should respect his wishes.
    KateShesGreat3

    Answer by KateShesGreat3 at 10:29 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • Thats not too soon.the day my grandfather got my grandmothers ashes he announced his engagement to his new wife. Now that was a little soon. But he he was 83 you can't expect a long wait when your old. Who know when you will die, and why not have some happinesss till the end. My grandfather is now 90 years old and has been remarried for almost 8 years and is very happy.
    motherwanting6

    Answer by motherwanting6 at 10:31 AM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • 1 year of mourning is all that is expected. He could have gotten married long before this.
    Be glad her daughter won't be ending up with your grandmother's wedding ring.
    LoveMyDog

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 10:39 AM on Apr. 15, 2011