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Trying to put my son down to sleep without holding him. any suggestions on how to put him down?

my son is 8 months old and wont go to sleep without me holding him. i really want to break the habit but just dont know how.

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Asked by bentley4eva at 11:10 PM on Apr. 15, 2011 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (12)
  • I know others will disagree, but I would let him cry ... just for like 5-10 mins. He will fall asleep and each night (hopefully) he'll cry less and less. I should have done it with my 22 month ... we still sleep together because she can't sleep on her own.

    Answer by kaylan010 at 11:15 PM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • other people have told me that to. but i feel bad for letting him cry, but i want to break the habit! i just got him to sleep in his crib about 2 months ago.

    Comment by bentley4eva (original poster) at 11:18 PM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • It's a tough spot because he's so used to you holding him and it's so hard for any mother to let their baby cry. I don't have good advice for you because I nursed my kids to sleep. It seemed the most natural way to me and except for them waking up to burp (which didn't always go well), it was ok. Might not be practical for everyone, but it was fine for me.

    I've read books that say to hug/kiss good night, put him in the crib and let him cry awhile, then go back in to reassure him after a few minutes. Then keep lengthening the time between visits because eventually he will get tired and go to sleep. Lay him down and rub his tummy each time you visit. The next night make the first visit longer, etc. Anyway other moms will hopefully give you good ideas, too.

    Answer by RobotLady at 11:27 PM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • I hate cry it out also and just can't do it....I have a seahorse that plays lullabies in her crib and she also takes a pacifier....but it's tough and I still have to hold her most nights. Mine is 8 months old also. I have a 2 year old as well, and I promise that it doesn't last forever, so just remember it's temporary! good luck to you.

    Answer by cdecker83 at 11:28 PM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • my daughter cris herself to sleep sometimes and bonus she cries so har sometimes she relives gas and she has stomach problems. When she cries herself to sleep she wakes up looking refreshed not cranky.

    Answer by Kimkh at 11:52 PM on Apr. 15, 2011

  • Does he have a "lovey"? Mine each developed one around 6 months and that helped them go to bed particularly when we were away from home. For my oldest we played a classical CD every night for him to go to sleep to. If you play it for a few nights while you are holding him, he may get used to that and know when he hears that it means it's time for him to go to sleep. Good luck!

    Answer by missanc at 7:28 AM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • We always found it worked best for us to get into a sleep time routine that was always the same. Bath, diaper change, swaddling, lights out, drapes pulled, soft music on or singing, cuddling/rocking/swaying. Not all of these but whatever works for you. When the baby got drowsy he was laid down. If done in the same manner, all the time, the baby picks up on the cues and knows it's time for sleeping. The lady I do childcare for has also asked me to follow a set routine with her baby. If the baby cries at all it isn't for long. And I don't mean screaming his lungs out, but minor fussing. This is what worked for us.  GL


    Answer by elizabr at 9:37 AM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • i dont agree with the whole let them cry thing. and i would let him fall asleep in your arms as much as possible. thats just me. more love the marrier right?
    he will grow to be independent of you someday, but why worry about that now? nothing wrong with needing affection from the mother...
    why want them to sleep on their own? when the child is ready, naturally he/she will sleep on their own!

    Answer by Liz4Life at 2:55 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • thanx for all the advice!!! i will be using some of them tonight! wish me luck!

    Comment by bentley4eva (original poster) at 6:59 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • nope i dont think your mean i think its a good thing actually the longer you hold him the more he will attach to it then when for whatever reason you cant he will suffer more then if you just stop it now and he might cry a little bit now but if you dont give in it wont take long to break the cycle and if you cant handle to hear it put him in bed safe and go where you cant hear it and just remember its not because hes hurt its just his way to tell you hes not happy with your choice well kids never are happy with parents choices and if you cant try to wrap him really tight in a blanket or lay him in the like crevis of couch like if yu were to lay on it then they dfont feel so open and not snugged hope it helps gl

    Answer by flipper4u21 at 11:09 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

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