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What can I do? Dh doesn't seem to get it..

I've told my husband that our 3yo DS is old enough to start understanding when he's told things, and that DH needs to not tell him stuff if he's not going to follow through. Like telling him he'll bring him a juice when he gets out of work in the morning, and like telling him we'll go fishing this afternoon when DH wakes up from his nap (he works nights, but has sat. night off, so he takes a nap when he gets home, so that he can stay up until bedtime with the rest of us.)

I just went in to wake him, to tell him that it's going to rain this evening, so if we're taking DS fishing, we should go soon. Instead of getting up, he says "it's ok" and goes back to sleep. Apparently he doesn't want to get up and do what he told his son he'd do. It totally ticks me off that he's told his son he'll take him, and he's not following through. DS loves fishing, mostly because it's time he gets to spend with daddy. How do I tell DS we're not going? Or how do I get DH to realize he's being a jerk and needs to get up and spend time with his DS? I'm sure I'm more upset than DS is...but still...

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Asked by BisketLiss at 2:20 PM on Apr. 16, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 18 (4,943 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • DS will catch on soon that he makes promisses and does not keep them. They know and if he does not care it would be better if he did not make promises

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 2:23 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I wouldn't tell my son shit.  I would make my hub get up and tell him.  I agree, it pees me off just reading that.  Do what you say your going to or say nothing.  I'm sorry that all I can offer is some computer hugs because I don't have any actual advice. 


    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 2:28 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • yeah i would make my husband get his ass out of bed and tell him

    Answer by mamawilbur at 2:34 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • he won't realize until later down the road..when your DS comes to you for everything and never comes to him he will wonder why. thats when you can point out to him "remember all those broken promises...well, i had to fill in that void and comfort him all those times."

    Answer by shay1130 at 2:37 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I would just take him fishing myself,, I don't think your husband is in the right at all, but I bet if you just leave a note,, he might get the hint, and start keeping his promises better,, you in this together, so when your DH doesn't do what he says you will do as a family, it makes your son think he can't trust you all, ... hope you catch a big one,,LOL!

    Answer by kimigogo at 2:38 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • Yeah I'd tell him to get up and tell DS himself that you aren't going.

    Answer by LadyStork at 2:38 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • It's not your job to explain dad's a lying dog. Let dad explain it to the child.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:42 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I would have made him get up and would all be going fishing. Screw that, he said he was going, he's going.

    Answer by Candi1024 at 3:40 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • His daddy needs to tell him why he isn't going to take him fishing.

    Answer by meooma at 4:37 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

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