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3 Bumps

For women who have been in abusive relationships....

I left him however I am trying to be civil for our son. However, sometimes I really get so angry at him for the way he still trys to treat me. I am over crying over him but I'm just so mad that he acts the way he does. I have been so forgiving to him but now I am just pissed off!! I feel so betrayed because he should be in jail but I didn't want to send my son's father to jail. Is this normal to feel this way? I really feel like he is taking my kindness for weakness. He uses every chance to make me feel like crap and I just can't handle it anymore! So how do you cope?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:26 PM on Apr. 16, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • I got sole custody and didnt have to deal with him. I was a bitch and made him have to go to anger management, drug test and everything else. I couldnt trust him with my kids. He was abusive and mean. The judge agreed.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 3:28 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • hugs

    mamawilbur

    Answer by mamawilbur at 3:29 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • Only YOU can allow yourself to feel bad. Stop stressing over it. Karma will get him 3 times for what he did to you. Just know the Universe is always working to keep a balance with everything. Pitty him if you have to feel anything. He lost the best thing's that ever happened to him....You & your son.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 3:30 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • i agree with vbruno
    mamawilbur

    Answer by mamawilbur at 3:31 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • It is usually the strongest women that get dragged down by a weak man. In my opinion, I think it is normal to feel guilt, but at this point you must do what is in the best interest of your child. From here on out, when it comes to your sons father, your childs needs should be first. No matter how you feel about him, your son is first.
    You are going to go through alot of different emotions. Anger, guilt, remorse, happiness. Good luck!
    sunrisekn

    Answer by sunrisekn at 3:34 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I have a protection order, and custody of our son, I'm moving to my grandmothers because he won't leave me alone and I don't want him knowing where I live. He tried to run off with our son and steal my car. I am just so mad because he ruined our family and now I have to leave my life, my job, and my friends. He is supposed to do DV counseling, parenting classes and drug/alcohol classes but I doubt he will do them. My heart is broken, I never wanted my son to come from a broken home....
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:35 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • Have you considered talking to a women's shelter just for advice? They may have some fabulous ideas and support for you. Best of luck!
    Nonoluna

    Answer by Nonoluna at 3:40 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I wish I could make this easier for you. Sounds like the 2 of you are going to be better off with out him in your lives. He doesn't deserve you or your son in his life if he doesn't want to help himself. Good luck, you have taken a big step forward. Do not look back. You are making a better life for you and your son.
    sunrisekn

    Answer by sunrisekn at 3:40 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I lost my job, moved in w my mom an hr away from him. Wrecked my Jeep. I feel like a kid now any mom dropping me off at work since we're in the country. I'm working fast food, way step down until I can pay to fix the Jeep. One step at a time. Concentrating on how fucked up everything is makes it more difficult. Just concentrate on one thing at a time. Mine should b in prison too. I put a protective order. Our million cases are still pending & if he keeps screwing w me & his baby I'll send his ass back to prison. At least then he'll see his baby more through pictures.
    shynu

    Answer by shynu at 4:02 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT DO WHAT I DID! My kids' father abused me in every which way. I never called the police because I was too afraid that he retaliate against me and my family.I left him and tried to reason with him but learned that to didn't work. He took me to court and we got joint custody and over our daughter because I NEVER CALLED THE POLICE! You need to get records on him! I have to send my daughter with him 5 days out of each week knowing that he used to abuse me! It hurts me so much when I have to send her especially when she cries not to go over there! I have been fighting the court system but if you signed the papers your pretty much stuck! Protect yourself and you kid!
    SMITxsM2

    Answer by SMITxsM2 at 4:04 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

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