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I don't really have a question... I just got done counseling an Iraqi vet. adult content

I work as an on-call crisis counseor for the local health dept. I got called in to the ER tonight for a man who said he just wanted someone to talk to. At first I was reallly annoyed because that's not my job. Our job is to evaluate sucicidal people for inpatient treatment. But I went ahead and went, and I am very glad I did. I'm not going to go into details about what this man told me, because I honestly do not know if I can repeat them without bawling again. I spent 2 hours talking to him and for about 40 min he just poured his heart out about everything that happened over there. It was hard to listen to. there were so many times I wanted to just tell him "please stop, I can't take anymore". By the time he was finished talking I don't know who was crying more, me or him. I cant' even imagine going through this stuff. He told me a little boy ran up to his friend, the boy was like 7 years, he was all smiles and laughing and reached up to the man asking for a hug, when he picked the boy up they both just blew up... That boy was a human bomb. I just don't understand it. How could someone do that to their own child? How could someone witness that and NOT go crazy. I talked to the man for a while and I gave him some references for therapists and helped him talk to the doctor about some anxiety medicaitons. When I got up to leave he grabbed me and hugged and just cried and cried for almost 15 min. I left the ER and sat in my car and cried for an hour. Most of the population has no idea what has gone on. And it's something we can't understand unless we have been there. He told me him and some of his buddies were in a bar one night and this guy walked up to him and said "I'm glad all your friends died over there." I bet if that man had been sent over there he would have a different attitidue. We are teaching thousands and thousands of young people how to be cold blooded murders and then expecting them to actaully go and kill people, but we are not giving them the support they need when they come home. He told him, "they thought me how to kill a man, and I have killed several men. But no one has thought me how to forgive myself." *and just FYI, he signed up for the Marines BEFORE the war started* In my job 99% of the people I deal with tell me "I cheated on my husband and my family hates me now, so I took 30 pills to try to kill myself" Or "My spouse cheated on me and I can't take it so I took 30 pills to try to kill myself" or some variation of that. Then I get this man who really has suffered more than I can even imagine. And he wasn't sucicidial, he just wanted a friendly ear. It really makes you think about things in life...

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:42 PM on Apr. 16, 2011 in Just for Fun

Answers (11)
  • god that made me start tearing up
    mamawilbur

    Answer by mamawilbur at 10:45 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • Reading that, made me tear up. I couldn't imagine, and my heart goes out to him and all the other soldiers. If I had to witness my friend along with a child getting blown up, I probably would have psychological issues, it would have made me crazy, literally. =[ I am SO glad you went, you probably lifted a weight off his shoulders. *hugs*
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:47 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • He told me a little boy ran up to his friend, the boy was like 7 years, he was all smiles and laughing and reached up to the man asking for a hug, when he picked the boy up they both just blew up... That boy was a human bomb. I just don't understand it. How could someone do that to their own child? How could someone witness that and NOT go crazy.

    WOW!!! That is really hard. I can't imagine using my child to do that. So heartbreaking!!! I bet he really needed someone to talk to, to break down and just cry with.
    You were probably more help to him then you could ever imagine!
    ItsJustMe1017

    Answer by ItsJustMe1017 at 10:50 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • that is what happens after the war (historicly speaking - think of the many crazy post vietnam movies on that topic ).. you should send a letter to someone who could change that. they do a lot of lip serivce about supporting people they tramatize but you never see it actually materialize - at least i havent.. though it may be hard to hear, you did a wonderful thing to be what he needed. are you afraid that he has been though too much to get over?? because i work with at-risk youths and it is absolutely amazing what some people are reslient enough to overcome(honestly not everyone but some - which is hope.) being that he came for help before he was at rock bottom (like the other suicide patients) is a really good sign.
    AmaliaD

    Answer by AmaliaD at 11:04 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I heard about terrorists using kids as bombs. it is really sad and sick. I am glad he had you to talk to.
    conweis

    Answer by conweis at 11:04 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • SO glad you were there to help him.
    sweetangie79

    Answer by sweetangie79 at 11:07 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • AmiliaD- I honestly don't know... the more he talked the more he calmed down. When I went in to see him his whole body was shaking. By the end only his hand was twitching. I think if he gets some intense therapy and finds someone he can really talk to he will be ok. I hope so anyways. That is always the bad part of my job. He is only the second person I have NOT committed, and I wonder about that other person every day... I have to beleive that he will pull through this.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:11 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • That happened in the Vietnamese War too so it's sad but no longer shocking that people do that with children. In some cultures they teach people that it's an honor to do it so they are proud to do what they do. Man's inhumanity to man (their own children)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • what a heart-wrenching story, I am so sad for him, but I am so thankful that you were there to listen. I am glad he could share his story with someone who cared. Thank you for sharing with us.
    Tarrar

    Answer by Tarrar at 11:19 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

  • I can't even read all of that :( My little brother is an OIF vet and I thought I heard a lot of stories before (things he'd tell my parents when he'd call, that they'd tell me), but once he got married SIL started telling us more things, more details to some stories, etc - enough for me to know that we are d*** lucky he came home at all. It IS awful over there, and too many people don't get it. But thank you for helping that soldier, for doing what you could.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:25 PM on Apr. 16, 2011

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