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2 Bumps

How any chances do you give

hubby has this idea in his head that he can send provocative txts and emails to random women and women that he has benn friends with in the past. He always lies about it to start with then FINALLY tells the truth.......

How many chances to grow up is to many???

Answer Question

Asked by broken_33 at 2:09 AM on Apr. 17, 2011 in Relationships

Level 4 (28 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • One chance. He's an adult and should no better. Everyone screws up, but when you do the same thing repetatively there's no remorse. I love the saying, screw me once shame on you. Screw me twice shame on me.

    Answer by lovinlifewith5 at 2:12 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • That depends on a lot of things. How long have you been together being number 1 IMO. Are you still in your first year? If so wait for him to grow out of it. Has it been a long time, or a lot of women? Run.

    Answer by jonellg at 2:13 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • I agree with Lovin. One chance is all he'd get. More like one warning. After that, its bye bye time.

    Answer by SalemWitchChild at 2:31 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • until youve been in those shoes its hard to judge and ive been in those shoes and i gave a second chance and we have been together almost 11 years

    Answer by mama2my2boys at 2:36 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • no chances. i am not going to wait around for a man to be/ get serious and honest with me. when it comes to relationships either you are in or out period.

    Answer by gwen20 at 2:53 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • I'm guessing you have kids since it's cafemom. I think I'd try marriage counseling, but, I don't think I could take too much of that behavior. I probably would want him to move out while we went to marriage counseling/

    This is a very personal decision. Only you can decide what's right for you. I'm so sorry that you are in the situation, and no one has the right to judge your decision, whatever decision you make. Good Luck.

    Answer by ohwrite at 3:17 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • we been married for 6 years, hes cheated once and done the txt thing 5 times, im so broken (hence the user name), how does one get the guts up to say enough is enough, its a scary thought

    Comment by broken_33 (original poster) at 3:27 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • It is scary, and it isn't easy, especially if you have kids to take care of. If you've decided you want out, but are scared of doing it, get some support. Maybe counseling for just you. I believe in trying to save a marriage if you can.....but what he is doing shows a lack of respect for you, your children, and your marriage, and it seems to be making you miserable. Life is too short to allow someone to treat you this way (and yes your children too, he doesn't care that he's jeopardizing their family).

    Make plans so that you are ready to do what you need to do. Go to a lawyer....I know it's expensive, but it's the best way to protect yourself. He may even have to pay. Make him move out or find a place you can afford on your own and move out. Take half of any savings or other money that you have, and transfer it to your name before he can take it. Be fair but protect yourself.

    Answer by ohwrite at 3:37 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • You'll be okay. I got married at 19, had a child at 21, divorced at 23. Hadn't really worked before, and I got through it. met an incredible man when I was 26, and married again.....and have been happily married for 22 years. To think that I could have stayed married to my ex and been miserable for the last 30 years, I would have missed out on so much that has been wonderful.

    You deserve better....give it to yourself.

    Answer by ohwrite at 3:40 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

  • First time shame on you, second time shame on me! I'd be more worried about the trust aspect of it... just my opinion. Good luck!

    Answer by oMiSSANNAMARiEo at 8:49 AM on Apr. 17, 2011

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