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me n my hubby have been havin problems

My hubby n me finally had our first daughter. since my daughter was born my hubyy n I have been having more n more problems and just yesterday he confess to me that when ever he thinks of me he suddenly starts to picture our daughter. He doesn't pay much attention to me n i have felt a little lonley. Is this normal for a couple??? Any advise for us??

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5KRAZYMOMMA7

Asked by 5KRAZYMOMMA7 at 6:47 AM on Dec. 2, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • I think it's normal. This must be your both of your first baby. It's kinda strange how before the baby was born, you were you, now you're her mom. Sorry to say that it's like that for a while if you're a full time Mom especially because no one sees you without the baby much. If you have sons already, then maybe it's because both of you are female? It's hard to get the balance again in the relationship sometimes because you're so overjoyed with the new child that you forget about their parents sometimes. I was ashamed that for a while I was a little jelous of my first daughter. She wrapped her Daddy around her finger right on delivery. If you nurse, it kinda throws things off too because that body is a baby's source of life, so you're physically still connected too (my hubby still doesn't mess with mine and I haven't nursed in about 2 years)
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 6:56 AM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • You are seeing eachother in a new light. He seeing the mother in you, and you're seeing the father in him. I know it's hard for MY husband to imagine me without our son now. I'm his life source and he's never far from me now. If my little man isn't near me when my hubby comes home he always asks "Where's Little Man?". I can't picture my husband without seeing our newborn. Things will get better, I promise. Things were hard for us in the beginning but our son is 3 weeks old today and things just keep getting better and better. Hang in there mama.
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 7:03 AM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • relationships always move on to another level  when kids come along ,you are so busy looking after your son or daughter needs you forget each other and that each other still have needs , its not a bad thing for your hubby to think of your daughter when he thinks of you ,b/c she is an extension of you .Try and have some quality time together get a baby sitter and do something together even if its curling up on the sofa together with a beer and wine and watch a movie ,alone time is soooh hard to find when kids are around , we have four so I should no lol... you will both find each other again dont worry . good luck x

    loulou332

    Answer by loulou332 at 7:53 AM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • My DH and I struggled after our first was born. I was adjusting to being mommy, my DH was adjusting to me being mommy and not being the carefree, travel at the drop of a hat woman he married. From past experience, try to find a sitter and go to dinner. Work on your marriage, it's the best gift you can give your child.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 9:15 AM on Dec. 2, 2008

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