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Crazy or normal mom?

So our DD is 3 mo, not our first, but first together the last one is 6 yo....so my DH thinks I'm a bit uptight or a over-reactor or worrier, and maybe I am. I'd like to think I'm like any other mommy, but I don't think he thinks so lol Examples of why he thinks I'm crazy; She still sleeps in our room, but in her own bed and I wake up if she breathes in deep, coughs, etc and get up to check on her. He says I jump up like a crazy woman, which I probably do, I just hear a noise and the first I do is go to check her. This morning, he brought her to visit me at work and was changing her on the counter which is about 3 ft off the ground and only about 3 ft wide, left her there and walked away to throw away the diaper. No she cannot role over completely yet, but she can get to her side and is very wiggly. He'll leave her on the couch on her boppy with her feet facing out, I ask him not to do that b/c she can pick her butt up and scoot down. We don't fight about it (yet) but he thinks I'm crazy.....So if I'm out of line I'd like to at least hear it from other momma's and if not how in the world do I tell him to quit doing these things w/o "nagging" or "attacking" him as I'm sure he'll say? Thanks :)

 
yesmaam

Asked by yesmaam at 12:34 PM on Apr. 18, 2011 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (11)
  • still sleeps in our room, but in her own bed and I wake up if she breathes in deep, coughs, etc and get up to check on her. He says I jump up like a crazy woman, which I probably do, I just hear a noise and the first I do is go to check her.
    ---------------
    Sharing a room is considered co-sleeping (not bed sharing, which is another form of co-sleeping)- it is well documented that women who co-sleep have fewer occurrences of SIDS. It is because we know when something is wrong, and we check on them!!

    You're not over protective, you're a responsible, attentive momma :)
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 12:49 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I used to be a heavy sleeper, but ever since I was pregnant, not anymore! From when the baby first started moving I would wake up at any little twinge she made inside me; now its worse since she's been born! Its not crazy, it is maternal instinct. As for the leaving her etc, you just somehow need to make him understand your concerns and maybe compromise a little. Don't freak out so much if he starts watching her better.
    Kari727

    Answer by Kari727 at 12:40 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • My kids slept in my room till they outgrew their bassinet. Then, to their own room in the crib. My kids are grown now. But, my twin boys, still at home & graduating next month - I still hear them in the night. I hear if they cough, get up in the night, are restless, even at 18yrs of age! It's a mother thing. As for the things you say he's doing, leaving your DD in precarious positions, I'd have a cow too. It is a matter of safety. Not just a difference in parenting methods. Discussing your safety concerns with him might help. But, he's a guy. So, I wouldn't hold my breath. LOL.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 12:41 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I've seen some crazy over reacting moms, but what you describe is not what I would call crazy. My one son will be 12 in 2 weeks and I still look in on him before I go to bed or when I hear him coughing--just as my mom did until I moved out. As for the changing thing. I used to scold my DH for that as well.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 12:42 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • You are perfectly normal! I have 5 kids and was just as protective over the first as I am with the last. We have to be cautious and handle our babies with care. Pray that no accident happens on hubby's watch due to his inability to foresee potential dangers.
    Proverbs_31

    Answer by Proverbs_31 at 11:45 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • I don't think your overreacting at all personally.  Some things are common sense.  If they fall, it's going to hurt, so why take that chance.  My first thought was "he's the one who needs to be a bit MORE "uptight". 

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 12:37 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • And I can understand the jumping up thing too.  It doesn't stop with the first one.  I'm on my 4th child and I still check on them while they sleep and make sure all is well.

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 12:37 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Thanks ladies I feel a little better. I just don't want him to feel like I don't trust him, b/c I do :) Just some things drive me nuts...
    yesmaam

    Comment by yesmaam (original poster) at 12:46 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I'd say normal. We all have our little things, I hyperventilate if the car seats are incorrectly installed or at the thought of the kids riding in someone else's car. I don't think it is irrational, there are just certain things I need to make sure are correct for me to relax about it. I keep my babies in my room until they are around 6 months old, sometimes longer. I like to be able to check on them easily during the night, and I often do check on them. I'm also very cautious about where a child is laid. I even go so far as to make sure the baby isn't left in a room alone with the dogs or the older kids. You never know what they'll do in an attempt to "help." So, not crazy at all, just a mom. Your way of doing things is different from his, and that is fine. Tell him to back off, you're just protecting your little one like all mommas do.
    fancyjane

    Answer by fancyjane at 12:49 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • your a completely normal mama.being woried/concerned about our children is as natural as a mama bird circling around her nest and head diving insto passerbys,lol.Its INSTINCT..we can't help it.And guess what?I'll children survive because of it :)
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 12:51 PM on Apr. 18, 2011