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I feel like I have no friends or even a life..

All I do is work all day from 9 to 5 and even after I get off work I still live on the park i'm a property manager so I have people coming to my door all the time...When I get home my boyfriend has been watching the kids all day and refuses to clean up anything so I have to start cleaning from the time I get home to the time I go to bed and if I even ask him to help he say what do you want me to do I have been watching to kids...He isn't working right now he stays home all day and watches tv and if he was really watching the kids the house wouldn't look as bad as it ALWAYS does...I tell him you can sweep or something and this is what he says....LETS GET ONE THING STRAIGHT I DONT SWEEP...The reason its in all caps is because he yells it...I am the property manager around here I don't need him doing things like that. I really want him gone the reason I feel like I have no friend and no life is because of him...None of my friends like him and I know why also everytime I say i'm going to see one of them or even going to my familys he says no your not and I tell him yes I am he says we will see and I end up not going because it will start a fight. Also I have 2 sons the youngest is his and the oldest is 3 he is mine and his real daddy has never met him...But my boyfriend Richard has been there since he was 2 months old so he knows him as daddy. But he is soooo mean to my son its not even funny and I have to fight for my son all the time. My 3 year old tells me mama I want daddy to leave. I want him to leave to but everytime I tell him to get out he says i'm not leaving. My boss told me that he would get him out if I wouldn't let him come back and I am just scared of what might happen but I think i'm going to have to do it for my sons sake and for my sanity...Please ladies advice

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Asked by jessesmama22 at 4:20 PM on Apr. 18, 2011 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,311 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Is his name on the lease? Kick him out NOW. Never ever let anyone mistreat your children. He is a controlling abusive lazy boy; you can do much better.

    Answer by meooma at 4:23 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • He is not on the lease and its a good thing.

    Comment by jessesmama22 (original poster) at 4:24 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • He needs to leave until he can behave himself. I know it's going to be hard, but that's the way it has to be. Think of it this way - you are the only person who can protect your children. From what you have posted, do you really think it is a good idea for him to have total charge of your children all day while you are working? Not helping with the household chores is also huge. He lives there, so he needs to contribute. If the shoe was on the other foot, wouldn't you have the house picked up and a meal waiting for him at the end of the day? The fact that he is separating you from family and friends is a form of abuse and control. If you are fearfull that he will get violent with you or the children, then ask for help in getting him to leave. You must do what is best for your children and you. You are their only protector. There are resources available to you. Ask for help!

    Answer by mrslabel at 4:29 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I was in an abusive/controlling situation similar to yours for 8 years. GET OUT NOW! Deal with everything else as it comes down the pike; getting out is most important! If you need any more advice, feel free to message me. Good luck, momma!

    Answer by Kari727 at 4:37 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Well, if none of your friends like him , its an obvious reason why. If you're out all day, working to make a better living for yourself and him, and he refuses to help with cleaning.....then maybe a reality check is needed to either get him in gear to help you or for you to open your eyes and see that it may be convenient for him being there to help with the kids but he's more of a hindrance than a help. Good luck and I hope it all works out for the best!

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 5:22 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

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