I didn't have much time to write this out as we were heading to the park with DS so here's more info.
As stated in the last post, I have been married to DH for six months and with him and his almost two year old son for a year. She heard DH call me mommy while talking to DS and says IN FRONT of DS "He shouldn't call her that. She isn't really his mom and he's gonna get attached and go berzerk if she leaves like his real mom did." It's like I'M on probation for what his ex did.
My point is she does this because she's used to being grandma AND mom. She is not his parent. And while I agree there is nothing wrong with expressing her concerns on the matter, the way she went about it was entirely disrespectful and just wrong. I also don't appreciate her doing so at the birthday dinner she insisted on throwing for me. It was a nice gesture that was ruined for me by that comment. I wouldn't have been as upset if she had pulled us off to the side at another time and said "Hey. This is something I'm concerned about." And she needs to understand that we are married now. That means I am his parent as well as DH and as his parents WE will decide what is best for him together. She has no right to say anything about it to DS or in front of him.
DS started calling me mom on his own and if we suddenly tell him not to, he'll think I don't want to be his mommy which just isn't true. We have never kept his biological mother a secret from him and never will. It also kills me that instead of standing up for me as his wife, DH simply suggested on the way home that he not call me mom in front of his parents. Again, confusing for DS! And if I was the one with a child from a previous relationship and my parents had said something like that I would've told them flat out that they were out of line and it isn't their decision.
Asked by Anonymous at 7:32 PM on Apr. 18, 2011 in Relationships
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