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2 Bumps

I want to know what is a step moms place really?

ive been married since august of last year and my husband and i both had kids before we got married so we have a blended family and have to deal with others and lately his kids moms have been calling me or yelling at me to my face about how im the step mom and i need to do this an that basicly take care of there kids while they do screw around but when i snap on them because im sry im not there mom and i do take care of them like they are my own but if there going to be with me ill raise them my way i just dont know wut to do anymore its stressing me out and im 5months pregnant and dont need the stress right now any ideas?

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angelnina8715

Asked by angelnina8715 at 8:28 PM on Apr. 18, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 8 (255 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • I"m confused. Take care of the dh and ex's kids while who screws around and why would you snap on them?
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:35 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • ive snaped because the one mom expects me to buy her kids things for when there with her and im not going to and the other one was bitching at me because i took her daughter on a city bus because my license were suspended im sry there state drivers and if we got to go somewhere its either i drive without a license or take the bus, its just little things that they think they can controll what i do when there in my care and im not going to have someone tell me what to do with my step kids when there father is right there with me
    angelnina8715

    Comment by angelnina8715 (original poster) at 8:39 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I'll tell you what works for me: I only deal with my ex-husband. I don't involve his new wife in our talks. I trust that my my ex-husband will care for my kids while they are out with him. I don't bug them and just let them enjoy the kids. I am the mom and if I want extra stuff done I take care of it. Have some set days where the kids will be in ur home and let them let you have family time. They shouldn't be bugging you and remind them that you're pregnant and stress is bad for the baby. If they don't like how you and ur husband run ur home they can choose not to leave the kids there as often.
    istealcookies

    Answer by istealcookies at 8:44 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • As a mom on both sides....I told my own kids...they are to obey the rules at Dads just as they would at a friends house. My sdd - she learned the rules (she was 2 when we met) and when troubles started coming up I told daddy he BETTER deal with her.
    brypmom

    Answer by brypmom at 8:52 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Ok I'm really not sure what is going on, seems you were upset when you were typing. However "the mothers" should not be yelling at you, around you or about you....You are not the one that sleep with them...I went through the same thing, the mother would send them with nasty clothes because I continued to buy new things when they came...Put a stop to that...Eventually my hubby and I ended up with all of them...During the time she did have them however I made it very apparent to her that if she needed to discuss anything that had to do with the children she needed to discuss it with her ex...Also informed her since she had no home training that my home phone number was off limits that why he and their kids have cell phones...By the way I made it my hubby job to enforce these rules ...Good luck..Aint nothing like baby momma drama...
    sam223

    Answer by sam223 at 8:53 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I am kind of in the same position with my bf. together we have 5 kids, and I am pregnant with "our" first. we r talking about getting married soon, so I will be his kid's step mom, and I am concerned about the discipline factor. i think you need to talk to ur husband and get him involved. the "mother" is not around to see what you do or dont do with the kids, so she shouldnt be telling you anything. plus, you arent the mom, she is...
    sarahlu

    Answer by sarahlu at 8:59 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

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