Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Can I slap my dil?

She is due in August and while I KNOW we all went thru the phase of what ifs.....she is so full of them....what if it has a cleft pallete, what if he/she is missing a toe/finger...I had enough today and said "what if this child is blind or deaf?" she asked they won't tell me that BEFORE hand? REALLY? No honey they don't....but what if are you going to NOT love this child? I followed up with the handmotion of circling my face and said "look at this what could possibly be not to love?" but seriously she is really freaking ME out thinking if something is wwrong she won't know how to love the child.

Any way I can help aleve her fears?

 
brypmom

Asked by brypmom at 9:13 PM on Apr. 18, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 17 (4,217 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • She needs to be more optimistic about this baby. If all she thinks about is the things that can go wrong, she definitely doesn't have a good outlook in mind. Tell her about some of your good experiences when your children were babies and give her something good to think about. It's not all bad you know. .
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:47 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Tell her the truth, that it bothers you when she talks like that. She is just being dramatic and wanting to be reassured that it is all OK. Just tell her everything will be fine when she makes statements like these. She is scared, insecure and needs reassurance. "Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it won't change anything.".
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 9:37 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • take away her copy of "What To Expect When You Are Expecting", lol. Bet you she is getting some of her crazy worries from that. Poor girl!

    Lynette

    Answer by Lynette at 9:17 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Give her a copy of "What to expect when you wife is expanding" it will give her and your son a good laugh and a ton more things to "worry" about
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 9:28 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Just tell her that they have done tests and the chances of anything being wrong with the baby is slim. All she can do is keep hydrated, eat healthy, and stop stressing. Congrats Gma to be!
    June_Mama09

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 9:18 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Thanks ladies....and Lynette that is her "fav book" lol
    brypmom

    Comment by brypmom (original poster) at 9:20 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • i will admit i had all those thoughts too but i don't think i wouldve loved a child less for any birth defects. i think its just concerns
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:35 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • Poor girl, I went through that with my first, and now am again with my second. No, you can't slap her lol
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 10:41 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • No you can't slap her although u may want to. I was a worry wart too during my first pregnancy and i know my I drove my mother in law up a wall.
    wowguildmomma

    Answer by wowguildmomma at 11:24 PM on Apr. 18, 2011

  • I don't know that she is necessarily worried about not being able to love the baby if something is wrong, but the worry of what will happen, what you can do, what the chances are, etc...but excessive. Then again, you know her and her tone better than we do.

    Just try to be patient and trust that everything will go smoothly in the delivery and the bonding will be swift.
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 12:21 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN