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I have two small boys an recently started dateing...

I have two boys 3 an 5 yrs old, their father left us in 09 an has been in an out of the picture, (its going on 5months sense they or i have heard from him last) i have sense been dateing a womderful man who is serves active in the u.s.army, my kids r very close to the point of calling him daddy (clay) but he is due for deployment in june, untill march 2012!! can i be setting my kids up for heartbreak (again) when another father figure leaves them?? An can this mess up their Outlook on all men includeing themselves when their adults?? please help!!

Answer Question
 
lovunmyboys

Asked by lovunmyboys at 1:33 AM on Apr. 19, 2011 in Relationships

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • With such a new relationship, I'd keep it on the down low with the kids. The relationship between this guy and your sons can get back on track after deployment. Don't put that sort of pressure on them, when he's not their dad and you haven't been dating him very long
    adnilm

    Answer by adnilm at 1:35 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • I agree. I am sure he is wonderful but I think its too soon and too much. I personally think its smart to wait a while before you even introduce your children to a new boyfriend. You don't want men coming in and out of their life, it only causes confusion for them and more heartache for you if it doesn't work out and you see how devistated your children are.
    Frogbaby83

    Answer by Frogbaby83 at 1:38 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • i dont see anything wrong with it and i would just explain to them he has a job he has to go away for they already know about him and they are gonna wonder what happen its ok to go away for works its not ok to run out on people and maybe they should know that sometimes people do have to do things they dont want to do life isnt fair but they will be back thats what real men do show them people do leave but do come back
    flipper4u21

    Answer by flipper4u21 at 9:23 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Way too early in a relationship for your boys to be that attached to someone else. Yes you could be setting them up for hearbreak if the relationship doesn't work out. IMO. Take your time, slow down.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 9:27 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • i agree with keeping things on the down-low...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:28 AM on Apr. 19, 2011

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