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My grandson holden is 3. Understands and communicates very well, but is refusing to use potty.

Holden is very stubborn, but will listen when there are no distractions and knows how to potty, but won't. I have a potty chart and will be getting a doll so he can model. My question is, how do I positively motivate him to use the potty? We have big boy underwear and he is starting to signal when he is wet and does poo. Should we just go ahead and start? Don't want a war every time. Should the intervals between potty sessions be every 2 hours ?
When my children were little it didn't take this much effort, but they were all in cloth diapers and then cloth training pants and that made it easier because they didn't want to feel the wet.
Thank you.

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pookie60

Asked by pookie60 at 1:10 PM on Apr. 19, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 5 (85 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • It happens. Just give it time. He will eventually want to not go in his pants. It's probably more of a control issue right now. My son will be 5 on August 28th & he ONLY poops in a little potty. He pees in big ones tho. In the long run, it doesn't matter what age they go to the bathroom. Embarrassment is what gets most kids.
    loudnproud87

    Answer by loudnproud87 at 1:14 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Thanks for the response. Embarrassment is a motivator, and it would be great if he doesn't have to suffer that, but you're right, eventually he will do it. It is a control issue right now, but he loves doing chores and putting stickers on his chart, so maybe it will carry over.
    pookie60

    Comment by pookie60 (original poster) at 1:18 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Is he just 3? 3 1/2? My son was 3 1/2. I knew he could do it. I put him in underwear. I got him character undies. I stayed home for 3 days. We were very positive. I took him every 1/2 hour the first day. The second day every hour or so. The third day he got it and was trained. Don't yell, there will be accidents. Give him m&ms every time he tries. Good luck!
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 1:19 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • try a reward (only after he goes in the potty). like a piece of candy, or a sticker. that worked with my son. make sure to catch him when he is dry, then have him sit for a little while. n go from there. a good time is first thing n the morning or after a nap, if he is still dry.
    sarahlu

    Answer by sarahlu at 1:23 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • It is not at all uncommon for boys to be 4 and just potty-training. Give him the tools, the potty . . . but don't stress over the age. It'll happen.
    ImaginationMama

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 1:30 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Thank you for all the very helpful answers! I will be implementing all the ideas and maybe come up with a new trick or two to share! Thanks again and hope to gain all kinds of insight from this site!
    pookie60

    Comment by pookie60 (original poster) at 2:42 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Holden just turned 3.
    pookie60

    Comment by pookie60 (original poster) at 3:08 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

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