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"oh just let him go, he'll learn"

Okay so has anyone ever been told by someone else.. "oh just let him do it, he'll learn" as to my 8 month old child.. i've beent old that before like if keep telling him no and he keeps going back they say "oh just let him do it, he'll learn" I DON"T AGREE WITH THIS. I feel that he is just starting to learn what no is and he doesn't really grasp the full meaning. Why would i just let him get hurt? Like pinch his fingers or fall over or something.

What does other people think about this??

And again, I do NOT think this way. But i just want to see what other people think...


Asked by krazyash023 at 2:05 PM on Dec. 2, 2008 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 2 (10 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • I don't agree with it either, and I hear it all the time from my family and friends. My daughter knew what no meant and listened to it by the time she was 6 months old. I refuse to LET my child be hurt because I don't feel like disciplining her or taking the time to show her how to do something the right way. I don't say no to her all the time. There are other ways of teaching your child right from wrong. I DO believe that there are some things a child should learn on their own. Like if you keep standing up in the bath tub you could fall and get hurt. But I didn't sit back and let her do it on her own. I was right beside her with my hand behind her so that she fell and got scared but didn't get hurt. I think people who go solely on that way of "teaching" their children are just plain lazy parents.

    Answer by lilbit837 at 2:14 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • well, at 8 months, no, i don't believe it. when they're older (like my son, 20 months) yes, i do believe it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:13 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • Yeah i think older would be fine but not at 8 months old or younger!! it drives me nuts LOL

    Answer by krazyash023 at 2:14 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • I'm with the "let them learn" philosophy unless it's dangerous! Then it's a smack on the bottom and time out (she's still learning what time out is). At such a young age it's hard b/c they don't know but after a year I started letting my daughter fall more and pinch her fingers in the cabinets. She doesn't understand that she *might* get hurt. But if she does, then it makes more sense to her b/c there is a direct cause and effect. I also use redirection and time outs. But somethings you just gotta learn. I taught her what "hot" was by taking her slowly closer and closer to the fire. She turn away from it on her own before we got too close. But I want her to understand what hot feels like, not just to stay away b/c I said so.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:16 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • yeah my son was about the same age when he understood no... he listens sometimes but sometimes i think he thinks its a game for me to get up and chase him he gets that cutelittle guilty look in his eyes and smiles and takes off other times he just listens... but i never ever let him purposely get hurt

    Answer by krazyash023 at 2:16 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • OMG!! I hate that!! People tell me that all the time and have since my almost 2 year old was born. They always say that same things along with, "give her space, she doesnt need to be buublewrapped, kids get hurt all the time shes fine, you have to let her go and when she gets hurt she wont do it again!". Like you said, why sit there and watch as you let them get hurt to "learn", when you can prevent the pain and suffering and take 10 seconds of energy to stop them and tell them its not safe? Kids shouldnt learn by getting hurt, they should learn by parents explaining and stopping them from dangers before they happen.

    Answer by asholan_07 at 2:17 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • I agree with it. Once they get hurt they learn.
    You should be there to watch and make sure he is not severly hurt. But i do agree with this way of teaching.
    It is your child though, so do what you feel is right. Dont feel obligated just ignore when people say that and do what you like.

    Answer by sassy_brizzy at 2:19 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • I do not agree with that saying. My son is 9 1/2 months old and climbed over our baby gate three weeks ago and fell hard and cried. Twenty minutes later, I turned my back for literally two seconds and he did it again! I was freaked out and he cried for about 2-3 minutes. Did he learn? No! He still tries to climb it, everyday, all day. I don't agree with that method of teaching anyway. People say that to me all of the time though.

    Answer by TeaAndrews at 2:20 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • I agree with it. I let my children learn many things for themselves unless it's potentially dangerous and in that case I just redirect them to something that isn't.

    Answer by Pauline3283 at 2:22 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • unless its going to cause major pain i let dd learn for herself. ive always gave her time to let her figure things out her own way.. Some people get on my nerves around DD cause they are always saying "be careful" "watch out" "dont get hurt" yadayada & guess what most of the time she doesnt! babies are pretty darn tough!

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 2:25 PM on Dec. 2, 2008