Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Deployment., if he is over there looking at porn?

if your SO is overthere looking at porn and other women on line do you really think he thinks about you? I am asking because when your apart should you be thinking about the other person not fantasies of other women. I am thinking that he doesn't need or miss me.. He hasn't even asked me to send pics or anything. Am I missing something? Ps he has Internet in his room
And so do lots of the deployed soldiers

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:21 PM on Apr. 19, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • i didn't care and still don't. porn is porn.. he can think about whom ever he wants as long as he came home to me and only me
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 5:22 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • You should send him some risque pics of yourself...get his mind off the porn and back on you {wink} Good luck mama
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 5:22 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • I agree with Lucky. send them to his email.
    jenn4443

    Answer by jenn4443 at 5:24 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • I think the way guys think about us (actual women) differs from the women in porn. He loves you and just looks at them to get off. i wouldnt put too much thought into it.
    alycia_21

    Answer by alycia_21 at 5:27 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • I think if this is an issue, it doesn't matter whether he's deployed or not: your relationship needs work. Personally, I wouldn't be comfortable with DH looking at porn anywhere, and if he were being distracted by it, it could happen at home as well as anywhere. Unfortunately, you can't spend your life policing your man. You have to decide what you're willing to put up with, and if he's into you enough for you to give yourself to him. Good luck!
    Adelicious

    Answer by Adelicious at 5:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • I also agree with Lucky.

    If you have a personal dislike of porn, and you would rather him not look at it... 1) if you haven't told him you do not like it and wish he would refrain please tell him so....2) offer to send pics/video of yourself for his viewing pleasure and see what he says...3) or.. just take some pics/make some video (whichever you prefer) of yourself and send it to him as a nice little surprise!!
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 5:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • While I personally don't like porn.....wouldn't you rather he be looking at porn than seeking satisfaction elsewhere. Send some pics....they don't have to be nude or make you uncomfy. Maybe one in a miniskirt.....my dh perfers those as "it leaves the imagination to run....."
    brypmom

    Answer by brypmom at 5:31 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Porn is just porn. I used to freak out about it too, until I actually watched some. LOL! It's hilarious more than anything. Porn is a guy thing I guess...guys just like porn. It's just the way it is. It doesn't mean he loves you less or doesn't miss you. It doesn't necessarily mean that he fantasizes about those women.
    I agree with PP - you should take some risque photos and/or video and send it to him. I bet he'd be happier than a fat kid in a candy store. He shouldn't have to ask - just surprise him. It will let him know you love him, miss him, and think of him. Who knows, maybe he will reciprocate in kind. ;-)
    FluffyMamaBunny

    Answer by FluffyMamaBunny at 5:31 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • First: unless he has a private email, do NOT email them to him. If his email address is military related, then someone else will be looking at them before they are sent to him. They have moderators who make sure that no one says anything that is classified.
    Second: maybe he hasn't asked for some pictures because he feels like it mind offend you if he asked for dirty pics. Maybe you should just send him some and see how "happy" he gets (wink wink).
    Also, I'd just like to say that my husband and I don't allow porn in our marriage. If flirting, and confiding in another man is considered "emotional cheating" then would watching and masturbating to porn be a form of "physical cheating"?
    an-apple-a-day

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 5:45 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • one of my husband was addicted to porn. It was horrible. I am sorry you are going through this. It changes the brain and sex is just not the same. I went through an addiction class on porn with him. It is amazing the things I found out. It was just like an alcoholic!. Atarts small and innocent. He was looking on the computer had magazines in his truck he went into bathrooms with it (even at work) It was hurtfull! we are divorced now and it was a ? i asked when i dated. I dont want that in my life! good luck! remember you deserve to be treated with love and respect...dont put up with something you wouldnt want a daughter or any one you love to put up with
    christinawillis

    Answer by christinawillis at 5:48 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN