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2 Bumps

How do I learn to trust again?

I've been in a relationship with what I thought was a great guy. Well within the last year he has lied to me about a lady friend of his and she is lying to me as well. They say they are like brother and sister and have known each other over 25 years. He has hid texts, calls,and things on facebook from me and just last night I found 2 pictures of her in nothing but a jersey. To top all of this off he is paying her airfare next month and she is going to be staying here in our house and I have no say. I'm already packing things because enough is enough but why do I still wanna cry when I don't even love him anymore because of this?? I don't understand...

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conniemc

Asked by conniemc at 11:17 PM on Apr. 19, 2011 in Relationships

Level 3 (15 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Once trust is broken, it takes time to heal... If I were in your shoes I would expect him to prove to me that he is worth my trust again. I don't care if it took a day, a week, a month, a year... If the broken trust totaled the relationship and you chose to move on with your life, it wouldn't be fair for the next man you decide to date, whenever you choose to get back in the game, to be punished for an ex's lying, cheating or whatever... Definitely easier said than done.. Some things in life aren't easy, but you need to put yourself first regardless because your heart and your self esteem is worth a lot more than a lie here, or a lie there. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. I'll be thinking good thoughts for you. Stay strong and keep on keeping on
    TexasMama2Boys

    Answer by TexasMama2Boys at 11:24 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • You wanna cry because you are hurt, because of his lies, and maybe because deep down you might still love him? I'm sorry you are going thru all this, if I was in your shoes I would wait until she got to the house and confront them both, if you still suspect lies and dishonesty then say goodbye to the both of them right then and there.

    And to trust again takes a lot of time, it all depends on you. But don't let his lies stop you from moving on with a truly great guy. A lot of new relationships crash and burn because of distrust caused by past relationships and you don't want that.
    GomezMami2908

    Answer by GomezMami2908 at 11:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Honey, First look at the lease, Do you HAVE to leave?

    IF NOT, THROW HIS ASS OUT !!!!!!!!

    You will never, be able to trust this man :(

    You need to get "PISSED", and hide the hurt From him CRY LATER ..........
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 11:43 PM on Apr. 19, 2011

  • Because change is hard. Your vision of your future has changed. BUT - move on. This guy is a complete jerk. He's invited another woman to stay in your house? All trust and respect should be gone by now, this guy is a loser. It's hard to move on but you can and you will be much better off. Good Luck

    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 2:11 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • I want to thank all of you for your feedback and your right I.am better off without him especially since they are both lying to me. I WILL be the the one to get the LAST laugh at all of this when it finally comes down to it. I will be doing great finacially and he will have to move because he can't pay his rent, I guess he'll have to go move back in with mommy and daddy..OH WELL.
    conniemc

    Comment by conniemc (original poster) at 10:00 PM on Apr. 24, 2011

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