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I recently remarried and I have 3 new stepdaughters whom I am getting accustomed to. Ages 15, 12, and 7.Its been a life changing expirience. I know that their mom doesnt spend ANY time with them. So when they come over i try to make it a memorable expirience with their father. I feel as if I have really high expectations or am I wrong but they come over and leave clothes in the bathroom, leave their plates on the table, eat snacks make a mess and dont clean it up....small things that I think that they can take care of. I dont let my kids do that i have 3 kids as well age 6,8 and 9. I talked this over with my husband and we sat them all down and talked to them and explained that maybe at their house there were not any rules but when they came over there were rules here. They seemed to understand and abided by them a couple of weekends but they are back to the same thing. I dont want to keep pointing these things out to my husband but sometimes I feel like their maid? I need advice :)

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Asked by selaranda at 1:44 PM on Apr. 20, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 10 (442 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • Stick to your rules. You're not a maid, and if you require your bio children to do those things, then they should have to as well. It's not going to hurt them, it's teaching them. Continue to stick to your rules, and talk to your Husband, in private, to back you up. That will make all the difference. Also, don't ask them to do things, TELL them. Then there's no choice in the matter, they do it or suffer the consequences.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 1:50 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • I agree with leftlane! MY step-daughter has to follow the same rules as my son.

    Answer by StefInfection at 2:09 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Don't bring it up to their dad. Tell them yourself, they need to clean up after themselves. If you catch them leaving a mess casually say, "Jane, can you get your clothes off the floor, please....Thanks!"

    Answer by matthewscandi at 2:45 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

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