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I may be over reacting but just need to vent some

My step daughter's mother emailed me and wanted to know if we will go in halves on a prom dress(stepdaughter is 14). This is an eighth grade prom. We told her yes. Well due to my husband being laid off we werent able to pay her on the week we told her we would and she got all pissed and went off on me about not helping and that she will do it all. Well they never went that weekend to shop for one. So we sent her half the weekend before last and they were suppose to go the following week and again didnt go. I just got off the phone with my mother in law and come to find out she is paying for the prom dress and her mother isnt because she claims she doesnt have the money to do it. It pisses me off that she is going to hound us for half the money and then have my mother in law pay for it and she gets out of it scot free with our half of the money. My questions is what happened to the money we gave her for the dress. I think she spent it on herself. What about all the money that she gets from her job and her husband job and the welfare she gets from the state. The one main reason i am pissed is because we alway pay my mother in law back every year at tax time for the things she buys for my step daughter and this is going to be one of them and its not fair because that means we bought the prom dress.

 
tgeary

Asked by tgeary at 3:53 PM on Apr. 20, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 13 (933 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I would just send her an e-mail letting her know that you talked to your MIL and she said she was paying for the dress and that you were just curious about when you'd get your money back. Don't be b*tchy or accusing, just simply ask...
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 4:06 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Ya that's pretty low of her imo, some people are just that way. But kudos to you and your DH for doing what you do for your step daughter. She will see what a bum her mother is one day :)
    yesmaam

    Answer by yesmaam at 3:58 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Yes, I would be upset. I guess your MIL thought she was picking up her son's tab (his 1/2 for the dress) and the mom was paying the other 1/2. Hence the money you sent to your dh ex.

    I am not understanding something. Your step daughters mom works, her huband works and they collect welfare from the state? How does that work.

    I think I would be upset. I would talk to the ex and see why she didn't pay the 1/2 like she said she was going to.
    ItsJustMe1017

    Answer by ItsJustMe1017 at 3:59 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • call her out on it and find out what she did with the money, if it went to your sd then its not the best but at least it got her something she may have needed, if not I would call her out on it!!
    choco_mom

    Answer by choco_mom at 4:01 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • I think that it is wonderful that you helped get the prom dress. Hopefully the girl does not know about your resentment. It is your husband's responsibility to support his daughter.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 4:03 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • @tootoobusy -- we pay child support plus buy her school clothes every year so we do support her.
    tgeary

    Comment by tgeary (original poster) at 4:18 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Does you husband pay child support,, if so then deduct the amount out on your next check, or tell the mom you know that grandma is paying and please use the money for shoes, and a matching purse,,, I wouldn't make an issue out of this, the kiddo is the one that is stuck in the middle, and how do 2 working people get welfare?
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 4:18 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • She works under that table and says that she isnt working..... they get about $600 - $700 food stamps also. Her hubby makes really good money to. She has lied to the state for years or at least as long as I have been with my DH and thats 6 years.
    tgeary

    Comment by tgeary (original poster) at 4:38 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

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