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What do you teach your kids about being bullied, or being picked on? Do you tell them to fight back? Stand up for them self?

I was just having a conversation about this with some of my friends on FB. What do you teach your kids, as far as what to do if someone is constantly picking on you...and may even have hit your child. What if the school isn't taking the appropriate actions, and you feel your child is being over looked? Well, I was talking to people and I said what I firmly believe. First of all, I know one hundred percent sure that my kids would not bully anyone. Yes I know this because it's instilled in their brains. They know better, trust that. My best friend and I as teens were bullied, jumped, etc by a bunch of black girls that hated the fact that some of the black boys in school had crushes on us.And no I am not being prejudice, lol...just saying what happened. Well, I have taught my kids that no matter what happens to never start a fight just because they are using words to try and bring you down. I taught my kids not to care about what others have to say. I hope they feel secure enough to know that. Now, on another note....I also taught them if someone is to hit you, you hit them back...and you better hit them back ten times harder! If the school suspends them, or they get in trouble...I will stand up for my belief in never letting someone hit you. No way. If only my mother had taught me to fight, only when I should...trust me those girls would have never done what they did. People know how to pick on the weak. So yes, if someone hits my kids, they better go right back...or they will be known as the weak kid, and be the one to easily be targeted. When your kid gets beat up constantly, other kids see this...and the cycle continues. I am someone that is stronger now because of what I went through, and I dont take any BS from anyone. So one good thing came out of it. But I wish my mother had taught me to stand up for myself, only if needed.

 
bellamommyof4

Asked by bellamommyof4 at 5:06 PM on Apr. 20, 2011 in General Parenting

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Answers (6)
  • He was taught to first ask the kid to stop, then to tell the teacher and next he asks the kid to stop or he WILL stop him. If the kid hit first, he is taught to knock them the heck out.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 5:35 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Mine were never bullied but were bullied on. One to an extent where we brought a lawsuit against his school, and won. In any case, I taught mine to go to a teacher and tell them what is happening. If that does not work they are to call me at home and I will come down and see about helping them take care of it. If that does not work then we call the police and press our own charges on the little punks.

    If someone hits them, my boys have all been taught self defense. They know under no circumstances are they to start a fight or bully anyone, but if someone comes and hits them they can finish it. They wont be punished by me for it. I am of the mind bullies only bully people they think will sit and take it. Once you stand up for yourself they tend to back down.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:11 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • our son is only 3 and not aggressive at all, he's been hit, bit, pushed and we've about had it.. we are teaching him to tell the teacher, be nice until it time to NOT be nice.. we are saying its ok to fight back
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 5:24 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • I enrolled my son in karate so he can learn discipline and how to protect himself. They are taught to only use force when it is absolutely necessry. I've taught my son to work out his problems through words and not his fists. I've also taught him that if he sees bullying then he should try to put a stop to it. All in all I'm really proud of my son. He is 6'2 now and he has lots of friends and some of the other kids have mentioned to me how he stood up to a bully who was picking on a smaller kid in his grade. He didn't use violence he just honestly asked the bully what the problem was and used reverse psychology on him. lol. Bullying is going to happen whether we want to realize it or not. It's important that our kids are prepared for it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:36 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • It has never come up but I will teach mine to stand up for themselves with words. Not whining for them to stop or I will tell but giving them witty ways to express the fact they are the ones being an @ss. If it doesn't stop then the teacher needs to be informed. If that doesn't work you go to the admin. If he is ever hit he should hit back and then run to an adult.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 5:38 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • My son is tall as well. My thirteen year old is only thirteen and 5'9. He is a sweet kid, minds his own biz...and has his circle of friends. I guess no one picks on him even though he is quiet because of big he is. He was on the public bus coming home from school, and some kids were picking on this one kid...throwing paper at him,etc. My son stood right up and told them to come do that to him. I was so proud of him. He was like mom, I really wasnt scared, I felt bad for that kid. Those kids just looked at my son, and didnt say a word. I guess my kid means business when he is mad lol.
    bellamommyof4

    Comment by bellamommyof4 (original poster) at 5:40 PM on Apr. 20, 2011