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2 Bumps

Stepmom to two boy ages 14 and 16. When they go to their moms who is bipolar how do we deal with the things she tells them and does with them. She always has a excuse not to get them on her weekend.

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susan808

Asked by susan808 at 8:53 PM on Apr. 20, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 2 (8 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Just remember that she is sick and you love the boys.
    Do everything to keep them safe, loved and happy
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 8:56 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Your question is confusing. If she doesn't take them and has excuses how can she tell them things? If she is speaking inappropriately to them go to court. If she is behaving inappropriately with them turn her in to CPS. If she doesn't take them...two choices just let it be and tell the boys I don't know why but it's her losss. Or..go to the judge and ask to suspend visitation because it is disruptive for them to plan and count on going and she bails. Also..keep hard copy notes of all texts, emails and such. Write down time and date every time she bails on them. That log will help you prove to the judge she is jerking them around.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 8:59 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Treat her as a person and remember she is their Mom!
    MomofJJS

    Answer by MomofJJS at 8:59 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Wether she is bipolar or not I think it is normal for her to be upset if you- their step mother- has her sons. Until you are in her place then try not to judge.
    Have you tried being friends with her? Seeing if she needs help?
    SeasideNative

    Answer by SeasideNative at 9:03 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • She left my husband and did not want custody of the boys. Now she has remarried and had a baby. Do you see why the boys are comfused.
    susan808

    Comment by susan808 (original poster) at 9:09 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • Teach the boys about her disorder and be there for them. Stop treating her as a disorder and treat her like a person. They are both old enough to understand the disorder and what is going on.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:32 PM on Apr. 20, 2011

  • This might be a great situation for a therapist who can sit down and be extremely unbiased with their questions. Someone that sees bi-polar patients that can listen to them and talk to them frankly about their mother's disorder and can reinforce what you are telling them - that it isn't their fault, but their mother's disease.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 8:29 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • She's over obsessive, and needs some anxiety medicine. And a HUGE break from life...
    melip06

    Answer by melip06 at 9:11 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • thats the million $ question!
    mommyof3-2008

    Answer by mommyof3-2008 at 3:50 PM on May. 19, 2011

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