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Prescription Pain Medication Addiction...

I am an expectant mom with a s/o who admits to having an rx pain killer problem... he almost seems to boast about it, and refers to oxycontins as his "true love", ext. He is the sole bread-winner and spends 40 + dollars per day to keep up his habit. Since we have found we are expecting his addiction has worsened and he shows no signs of stopping. He complains about the financial burden of a baby, but not the financial burden of his addiction (which is clearly more expensive). I have lived with addicts my entire life and this is nothing new to me, and his addiction does not seem to be that big of a deal because he pays for it himself, and is not abusive like the other addicts I have dealt with. I love him very much, and I want him to get better, but I know that pushing treatment on him is not the way to go. Anyone else dealt with this??? How did you cope/handle things. Please only experience based answers.

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:31 PM on Dec. 2, 2008 in Health

Answers (6)


    Answer by Anonymous at 7:35 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • I have never dealt with this situation, but I did have a sister that went from having it all, 3 kids, nice car, house, etc.. to being homeless, having nothing and a drug addict. When she decided to get help it was because I sent her an anonymos letter in the mail telling her to wake up and how screwed up her life was and what she was doing to herself and her kids. The day she got it she signed herself into rehab. Maybe you could have a friend do this or even you type one and make it look like it came in the mail. Good luck!


    Answer by asholan_07 at 7:41 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • Yes, I didn't get pregnant by him, though. His addiction was more important than me, his kids, and anything else in the world. It is not a good life to bring a child into. Personally, I would run for my life and never look back.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:41 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • I'm sorry anon 5:35... but what does this have to do with coping or finding a way to discretely help without being codependent?? I am a recovering codependent.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:46 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • Just to throw this out there, a friend of mine had the same addiction and ended up having a tumor in his butt and really bad digestive problems because of it. As an ex addict of many other things than pills... Not much you can do to stop him. To keep the peace over money, breast feed and find the cheapest way to live so he won't come down on you for it. You getting mad at him over his addiction will just make him want them more. Hopefully the baby being here will get him to stop... good luck!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:35 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

  • If he wants to blame you or the baby for problems stemming from his addiction, like financial burden, then he will regardless of what you do. Don't cater to his problem. You said you were around addicts all your life; I recommend al-anon meetings. Especially now before the baby comes and you have the time and energy--although there is no problem bringing newborns to meetings. I live with an addict who has really cut back on his drinking, but the behavior is still there. Addiction is looked at as a disease and the substance to which they are addicted is really only a symptom. Go to this program--you can find peace and clarity of mind even if the addict is still using. With clarity of mind, you'll then have an easier time making the decisions you need to.

    Answer by Pumamama at 10:42 PM on Dec. 2, 2008

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