Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

School has now called me for the 3rd time reg. dd age 13 and lunch..and money.

so school called again saying they noticed dd dosent eat lunch..i am aware and have talked to dd she says i dont like there food and when i bring lunch its gross by the time we have lunch..i was the same way at her age. so when dd gets home from school she makes herself something..soup, noodles, sandwich...what ever. but when the counslers questioned her dd said we dont have money to put on her school lunch card ( we do and she knows that ) and she also told them we have no food at the house. which i responded with yes i do and im sure i have enough food in stock to feed the whole school. ( i swear i do ) and that they could come by anytime and look in my 2 fridges and 2 freezers along with all my cabinets and pantry. ( swear i have a hording proublem with buying food ) i explained to them she does eat even if she dosent in school. i also have to lock snack cabinets due to the fact that she will have at it if she has an oppertunity, shes the kind that will eat snacks before actul food. when she had money on her school card she spent it on school snacks..not lunch. which was another discussion of i hate there food. so what do i do? how would you go about this? i told dh that i was gonna show up at dd's school at lunch time with lunch and sit with her to make sure she eats. for her to tell the school we have no money or no food really irrates me. my dh works hard to pay for stuff and still buy food. i will also add we have only lived in this town 6 months we bought this house so shes new to the school and everyone else. i hate getting attitude from the school staff. help...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:18 AM on Apr. 21, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (16)
  • I feel your pain, I get shit from the school nurse all the time. But she is painfully ignorant. Liek last time i was there she gave me a eye exam form i had to have filled out by his opthamologist, She told me she thinks he needs to be wearing glasses because his vision is bad, meanwhile he is standing there looking at her like an idiot because he had his glasses on. She has recommended he gets glasses 4 times this year, while his own teacher has told this woman that he wears his specs every day. Stupid is rampant at my kids school LOL

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 11:23 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Can you talk to the school about if you put money on the lunch card for them to be sure she doesn't buy snacks?
    That would end them contacting you about the money situation.

    As far as making her can lead a horse to water, but can't make them drink. GL momma

    Answer by Chloesmom1126 at 11:24 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • If the school staff is ignorant enough to continue to point the finger and blame you for your daughter not eating lunch ask them what they suggest? You can't FORCE her to eat something she doesnt want to...shes 13.Does she LOOK malnourished or underfed? Just tell them what you've said here. Tell your daughter if she doesnt want to eat..fine but don't lie about WHY shes not makes you(her mother) look bad and you don't appreciate it one bit.
    I wouldnt even worry anymore about it.And good for you for locking the junkfood up and making her eat healthy food first.I have a cousin that will eat nothing but junk food allll day..and never once eat a solid meal.It hurts my stomach just thinking about it.yuck.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 11:27 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • I'd be asking her WHY she lied to them, let her know it's hurtful to you that she would lie about such a thing, and also hurtful that they think you are not providing for her when you in fact are. Is there anything else going on with her? Has she made new friends?

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 11:29 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Find a therapist for her to talk to. A big transition at 13 is hard. Moving is very hard.
    Then take her to a doctor and get it in writing that she is healthy and wave that in the school's face!!

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 11:58 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Based on my own lunchtime experiences in high she lacking friends to sit with at lunchtime? One of my teachers called my parents one year because I never ate lunch - I didn't tell anyone, but the reason I never ate was because I never had anyone to sit with (we had split lunch shifts and that particular semester ALL of my friends at the opposite shift). I never brought lunch either because we didn't have stuff at home to bring. Once in a while I'd buy an apple from the school bookstore and eat that. Just an idea. At that age it might be hard to admit that's the problem, if it is, but if she's telling different people different stories, I'd bet it's something along those lines.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:08 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Good grief- sorry you're going through that! What a mess! Some of the staff at my DDs' school are kinda slow, and a bit ignorant concerning certain things, but at least they are good hearted and mean well. I would go in and have a sit-down with the principal and the counselor. Bring your DD along, and make her tell the counselor that she lied about not having food or money, and make her tell them why she doesn't eat at lunch time. Good luck!

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 12:46 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • My 7 year old daughter was giving us issues about eating at school. She gets breakfast and lunch there (that's what the school offers) and she would only eat a yogurt or nutrigrain bar. It was healthy, but she needed to eat more. So I circled what she was to have for both meals on her school menu each day and sent a copy to her teacher and lunch room attendant. I asked if they could monitor her for us and if she doesn't eat, she's not allowed to go outside for recess and has extra school work to do. That straightened her out quick, lol.

    Answer by Kari727 at 1:29 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • My Gosh... how small is this school that they notice a 7th grader not eating????/


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:44 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • thank u very much ladies xo she does have plenty of friends and too boot her 2 step sister also attend this school and she close to them so i know the friend thing is not the issue. the school is small around 250 students all together. i buy her what she wants weather its yogert, pickles, apples and so forth. she rather eat them at home but will sometimes take a yogert. she just dosent want to eat lunch lunch at her school. again she says its gross by the time its lunch.. i was the sameway so it didnt bother me i know she eats at home. i am hurt that she is lieing and also maken me look bad when we try hard to do whats right for the kids. i do plan on friday going down to her school and haveing a sit down with everyone.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:17 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.