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I feel l'm over reacting a bit

DH works very far away, like an hour and a half drive away, which I used to be fine with, but now that we have a baby it's getting to me, he usually ends up getting home at 7pm in the evenings, and he's usually tired after working so long, so I have to take care of the house & baby all day, and at night because he's up early, which I know is my job, and I'm fine with that, but he said ages ago he'd look for something a bit closer so he can spend more time with us, but he still hasen't done anything about it :( he says how much he doesn't enjoy his job, how alot of money goes on transport and how he misses us, but he still isn't doing anything about it. I don't want him to quit, but I would like him to TRY looking for something else.

Ok I feel mean now :( I just miss him thats all


Asked by kylie_bob at 11:51 AM on Apr. 21, 2011 in Relationships

Level 22 (14,066 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I know exactly how you feel.. My huz works 13 hour shifts from noon to midnight on an ambulance.. He's been wanting to get out of the company he is with now to get on 24 hour shifts instead but no one will pay him what he is making now. It can be fustrating but it's only temporary. I'm studying to become a Medical Transcriptionist so I can work from home and he will be able to drop the ambulance down to part time, or do the organ recovery (which he also does on his days off for extra $$). It's a sacrifice for now, but it will get better. Good luck!

    Answer by TexasMama2Boys at 11:54 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • well on the bright side be thankful you can stay home,, I wouldn't push him too much mamma, if his job is secure ,,,the grass is not always greener! Huggs to you,,

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:55 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Hope you feel better.

    Answer by meooma at 11:52 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • You're good :) It's just a pain in the rear looking for a job, specially these days, that's probably all. GL I hope he finds one!

    Answer by yesmaam at 11:53 AM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Look at all of the military wives with their SO/DH's far away for months at a time, or even yrs. My Hubby is gone 4-6 weeks at a time and we have 3 boys that I care for along with house, cars, yard, etc etc.... I appreciate the fact that I can be home to do all of it. It was hard when they were babies, but just remember they do get older, and go to school, then you will have a break. Look at the positives, and not the negatives. I know you miss him, but try and remember having a job these days is a bonus. There are so many people struggling. Be there for him, and make a special time for the two of you to recharge once a week or so. That might help you both as well.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 12:03 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Try looking for jobs for him and then letting him know what you find that he can apply to...he'll hopefully appreciate the effort and realize how much you rather him work closer. Don't feel bad, I'd be frustrated too.

    Answer by lexi8622 at 12:04 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • I've been there before, sweetie. Definitely no fun! What we did was move closer to my DH's work, because it is an awesome opportunity for him, and he's moved up from bottom of the line, literally, to supervisor in less than 2 years. He's been there for 5 now, and he's got seniority over most of the guys there, and there's a sense of job security. Maybe that's what your DH is worried about? The job security thing? Plus, it's just SO hard for people to find work nowadays, so maybe that's another thing on his mind. Why don't you guys talk about it? Communication is a BIG part of your relationship. Good luck, hon!

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 12:07 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • His job now isn't secure, thanks for all the advice, I'll have to talk with him later :)

    Comment by kylie_bob (original poster) at 12:10 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • It is very hard to find a job these days. On top of that, it's hard to look for work when you work full time. Obviously, he can't look while he's at work because then they'll know and it's a pretty good bet they'd get rid of him then. And if he doesn't get a lot of time with you and the baby, he probably doesn't want to take away from that little bit he does get to do a job hunt.

    Maybe you could ask him if he'd like you to help him out a bit by looking through the classifieds? You could offer that if he leaves copies of his resume for you, when you find something you can tell him about it and if he wants to try for it, you could fax/mail/email his resume out for him.

    Other than that, as others have said, just be glad that you're able to stay home with the baby and that he's willing to work so hard so you can. A 3 hour daily commute...that's a big thing.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 12:47 PM on Apr. 21, 2011