Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

How can I be a good step-mom?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:07 PM on Apr. 21, 2011 in General Parenting

Answers (9)
  • Treat your step children as your own. Love them, put them before yourself (as you would your own kids), and make them part of the family you and your husband are creating.

    Answer by ohwrite at 6:09 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Treat them all the same, and always make sure you put your biological kids first.

    Answer by ambr2006 at 6:11 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • I just heard of a great book on being a step parent. Sorry, I don't remember the title but you might want to browse a good bookstore.

    Answer by elizabr at 6:12 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Treat all your kids equaly weather they are yours or not. Its pretty simple as that and do whatever do you as mom to them. Love them as if they were born from your flesh and take time to get to know them individually and let them know how special they are to you even if your not their bio mom :)

    Do the children see their bio mom?

    Answer by SweetPoison at 6:15 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years...we both had bad marraiges before and have been taking it slow...we recently got engaged and everyone, incluing us, are very happy. Lately, his daughter has been getting on my nerves. She's constantly hugging me and kissing me and rubbing my back. She lived with her dad, my fiance, for the first 9 years of her life and now lives with her mom, She is 12. She tells me she doesn't get very much effection where she lives but my children are starting to recent her visits because, for one, she is very smart and tries to show off. She also hangs out with adults alot...She talks like a 30 year old, which drives me crazy and tries to argue her points with me...I'm startign to recent her visits, too....What do I do? I completely love my fiance...we are perfect together. She is pushing me away.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:18 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • She might feel threatened that she will "lose" her father. She may feel very insecure right now. Talk it over and get some professional advice if need be. If you are taking it slow it may all work out after she realizes she has nothing to worry about. But it's a time to give her support not be resentful. GL

    Answer by elizabr at 6:22 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Why is she getting on your nerves?
    She is "constantly hugging me and kissing me and rubbing my back". Why does this bother you? I would be happy that she is comfortable enought to do this.

    As for talking above her age...that is a normal pre-teen. It has nothing to do with being a step-daughter.

    Just listen to her, show her who is the parent and the adult, be there for her.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 6:30 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Treat your step child or step children like your own.

    Answer by TeresaM35 at 9:39 PM on Apr. 21, 2011

  • Why are you uncomfortable with her showing you affection? If this is the reason you are being pushed ur fiance I'd be taking my daughter and offense

    Pre-teens ACT like adults ALL THE TIME..just wait till ur kids go threw that!! seriously!!!

    She also may be threatened about her father like a PP had said. Daughters at that age are very vulnerable in this situation. try talkin to her about it

    Answer by SweetPoison at 12:21 AM on Apr. 22, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.