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2 Bumps

Was she a little unreasonable, or do I need to get a grip?

We're visiting my SIL and my 19-month-old picked up a decorative glass ball from her coffee table in her front room and chucked it on the floor--shatter! When we've been here before, I always put those things up on the fireplace mantle, but they usually end up back down on the table. Anyway, when she heard it and came in, she said, "I'm not going to put the whole house up, you guys need to teach him not to touch stuff!" (she has teenage daughters) I just said he hasn't had a chance because he's not around breakable stuff at home.

She also said to my DH, "Remember grandma had all kinds of nice things in her house and we were taught not to touch them." I kept my mouth shut and didn't remind her that they all HATED their grandma!

Now, I agree, my son needs to learn not to pick up random things and throw them, and he is in the process of learning that, but in the meantime, it's going to happen now and then, and if she's determined to leave stuff laying around, there's always a chance it's going to get broken! And I'm not going to punish him for throwing something that looks like a ball....

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:58 PM on Apr. 22, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • WOW these ladies are being pretty rough, he's almost 2 that's what 2 year olds do ! Yes, like you said teach him what he can and cannot do at other peoples' homes, but for crying out loud he's a baby! At most I'd apologize and offer to replace it. I think you did just fine momma :)
    yesmaam

    Answer by yesmaam at 3:49 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • As far as him throwing something that looks like a ball... you are correct not to punish him.

    But I still hold to the truth that YOU need to teach him what he is allowed to touch and not touch and that to expect others to alter their homes is rude.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:03 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • YOU were the one that is wrong and she is 100% correct.


    It is unfathomable to think that because you are coming to visit people need to rearrange their homes.... that is rude.


    I hope you offered to pay for it.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:01 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • That is why I do not invite people who have kids over to my house. Kids break things. My DD and her 2 DD's, 2 and 6 yo are living with me.. I had to totally rearrange the living room and pack up all my things to accommodate the 2 yo. Hate it!!!!

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:07 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • i dont have anything in my hosue that my children can pick up and throw.. i know how toddlers are! .. we go to my husbands grandma's house a lot and she has breakable things on her coffee tabel and elsewhere i have taught my children not to touch things.. they learned that since they were crawling and standing/walking!
    3HappylKidds

    Answer by 3HappylKidds at 2:12 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • I'm the mother of a toddler and while your SIL doesn't have to rearrange her house for you, it would have been considerate to remove the highly breakable things that not only can shatter, but also hurt your little guy as well. From what you've written just above this, It sounds like she has other issues and she doesn't live on the same planet as you. Just shake your head and do your best when you go to her house. I'm right there with you trying to keep DD's hands away from the china figurines...
    jmpj8107

    Answer by jmpj8107 at 3:52 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • Your family could be kind and help you out. My Grandma has breakable things and I don't enjoy the visits much because I am completely occupied keeping the kids from touching things. Of course, you should keep your kids from touching things, but it SO not easy. I feel for you.
    Hazelnutkin

    Answer by Hazelnutkin at 2:16 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • i dont know it sounds like everyone is getting on to you about this. I have things that are breakable in my house but i teach my children not to touch but i'm also realistic that it might happen at home and others houses. So i keep a close look out and move them to rooms that they are allowed to be in or bring something to keep them occupied. And i get her point and yours i would feel bad about it and offer to pay but woudln't expect her to think that all kids are alike.
    amberpaiz

    Answer by amberpaiz at 2:24 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • Thanks Amber! I'm definitely open to constructive suggestions, and like I said, I agree I need to teach my son not to touch certain things. I keep breakable things out of his reach at home, and there are certain things (like my computer and phone) that he is not allowed to touch and he will get his hand spanked if he does. But how is he supposed to recognize things he's not supposed to touch in other people's homes? That's part of a learning process. There were 3 of us there when this happened, and my DH and other SIL were closer to him than I was, and none of us caught him before it happened or had told him not to touch them. If he HAD been told, I would have disciplined him, but this is the reality of toddlers, you just can't always catch them in time. Even then my SIL wasn't going to move the rest of the glass balls except my other SIL convinced her to. DS is a pretty good kid, but things happen.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:34 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

  • If I was inviting toddlers over to my house, I wouldn't assume that my breakable things were safe. And if I chose to leave breakable things out, i would NOT expect their moms to pay for them if they got broken! That would be my own fault.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:35 PM on Apr. 22, 2011

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