Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do i get my fiance interested in my pregnancy, he was when i was pregnant w/ our son now just turned 1 ,i had 3 miscarriges last yr,b4 giving birth to our son, he was interested then! but now he wont even talk about names, im almost 30 weeks, an he only felt the baby kick once, b/c i told him to feel my belly, n he NEVER told his family im pregnnt agin, i had to force it by askin him if i could put pix up of my sono on FB??

Also when i had to go to a sono apppt. i made him come w/ me b/c i ws on crutches from fallin down my stairs, and we live in a building w/ no elevaor were on the 5th floor 2!He didnt even come to the hospitl until he got off work sum 4 hours later an iwhen i wasked hime to help me get to the bathroom he told me to get someone else too!! n he took my son n went into the waiting room! He also said after i begged him to come to the hospital, b/c i was stuck / my son , w/out enough food n diapers for him! I was on my way to church when i fell, 5 months pregnant 2! He wanted me to go alone, to all my Dr. appointments. we were gonna find ou the sex of the baby @ that appt. but since i had no sittter an actually called his boss to ask for the day off for my fiance!!! He lied to me an said he asked his boss for the day off!! I CAUGHT HIM!! CUz his boss called me back an said consier it done! i gave him off all he had to do was ask! n he also said he tells Sal (my fiance) that he can go home a litt earlier somtimes, but sal says no, he doesnt even gt paid by the hour only by the day!! I told him when i found out i was pregnant again he said WTF!! I thought u were on birth control! i was except i switcted from the ring to the pill n got pregnant during the switch. My son was 5 months old when i got pregnant. And when we found out that our son (in mybellly) had xra fluid on his brain an i had to do all these tests my fiance 2 for genetic disorders an all i was hysterical!!! he didnt even hug me! or tell me its gonna be ok! same thing when my popop died this september!! a few weeks b4 i got pregnant!! we've been fighting alot lately, cuz when sal was a newborn, my fiance wouldn;t even hold him, except @ the hospital!!! n never helped me at all, his parents sadly are desceesed due to cancer an he just got in contact w/ his bro's in Statan Island. I dont get it it really hurts, b/c i feel like he doesnt want this baby ! i even told him when i found out i was pregnant i would have n abortion, if it was too much on him, even though im completely gainst abortion, i was willing to do it to save my family, so my son i have now wil have a father.Anyone else goin through this.??? He ignores me n laughs @ me when i try to talk to him about important stuff, an when i get mad he saysim the crazy one!!LIke he calls me pyscho!!its my medication he says! i had to go back on my anxiety meds during my 2nd trimester b. i was having HORIBBLE Panic attacks!! Also when i ask about $$$ he says its none of my business!!! Please i need advice, should i love him or leave him?

Answer Question
 
xxevolangexx

Asked by xxevolangexx at 10:28 AM on Apr. 23, 2011 in Relationships

Level 3 (13 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • There is nothing you can do to make him interested. You have no power whatsoever to change him in any way. He is what he is and that appears to be a very selfish individual. If I were you, I would be looking for ways to get away from him. I believe it is time that you faced the truth of who this man is and stopped thinking that you have any ability to fix him. The only way he will ever change is if he chooses to, and that is very unlikely to happen.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:37 AM on Apr. 23, 2011

  • thank u ur're right, it sux im almost due, and i want him to be there for the birth, an be bthere for our son we have now, its hard, but i kno i should leave him, im going to wai until the baby is born though. i was goin to leave him in the begining of tis week, but i didnt wan to ruin my sons first easter w/ his dad.
    xxevolangexx

    Comment by xxevolangexx (original poster) at 10:45 AM on Apr. 23, 2011

  • As far as being interested in the pregnancy my husband was soooo interested and excited about my first pregnancy but my second one, which was 5 years later, he wasnt really excited at all. He would just say weve been thru this before...I think for men its just harder to be excited because they dont feel the baby and if this isnt your first pregnancy they do think its all the same...My husband is an amazing father and youd never guess he wasnt excited the entire pregnancy...Keep your head up hun.

    However, if you had problems before you got pregnant with the second one you shouldve been extrememly careful during the switch...Pregnancy can be very stressful on a man, especially if he is the sole provider for the family...He does sound extremely selfish but now you have a baby and one on the way with him it sounds like you might have got to know him better before you started a family.
    jazzysmommy1004

    Answer by jazzysmommy1004 at 10:59 AM on Apr. 23, 2011

  • sounds more like he isn't interested in YOU sadly. He got his son, his one pride and joy to pass the family name on. or maybe you are being one of these "crazy" pregnant women and don't notice it. try giving him a break..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Apr. 23, 2011

  • I'm sorry, I don't speak Avatar or whatever language this is written in...
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 11:30 AM on Apr. 23, 2011

  • Could the fact that you had so many miscarriages be making him nervous to get excited? I know that you are 30 wks so you are past most scares but maybe he doesnt know how to accept this fear that he has. Other than that he sounds really selfish and somewhat self centered. Do what you need to do to keep you and your child/ren happy and healthy. Good Luck Mama!
    alligurl186

    Answer by alligurl186 at 12:35 PM on Apr. 23, 2011

  • Why are you with this asshole?!
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 12:48 PM on Apr. 23, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN