I have had it with my kids! two boys, 2 yrs and 6 yrs, so an obvious large amount of years between them both physically and developmentally. My 6 year old is constantly harping on and bossing around my 2 year old. Any chance he gets he yells at him for something or physically assaults him (nothing major, but he will push him or smack him with a toy to get him away from him). I try to make things fair because 2 year olds are annoying and ofcourse always wanting to be and do exactly as big brother does. They do not have seperate rooms because it is not a possiblilty, nor do we have a play room besides our front room. I give older brother 'alone time' every day so he can be left alone, and he also has specific toys he doesnt have to share, but he is still having a hard time sharing anything.. ever. He really believes everything is his no matter how I try to explain to him its not. He loves to share with friends, just not his brother. He tells me he hates his brother and wishes he was dead.. It is killing me. Every morning I wake up to them already screaming at each other..a nd it continues all day. By 10 I am feeling murderous. I cant possibly keep them seperated all day... I just dont know what to do. So tired of breaking up their fights, but i feel like i have to because my 6 year old has such a great adventage. I try to be fair about whos in trouble because i knwo it isnt always the older one, even though he is the one who is much more aggressive. If they were closer in age I would let them just fight it out. I really got mean with my oldest just now because I caught him smacking my 2 year old over the head with a toy... I just cant figure out how explain to him that it is not nice or acceptable... I try but he just doesnt listen. I feel awful.. Other than their issues he is an amazing and very sensitive guy.
HELP! How do I handle this?
Asked by Anonymous at 12:22 PM on Apr. 23, 2011 in General Parenting
Answer by zoejains_momma at 12:26 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
Answer by Jersey_class at 12:30 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
Answer by matthewscandi at 12:30 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
Answer by Rosehawk at 12:40 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 12:50 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
Answer by bcauseimthemom at 1:35 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
My number 1 rule, and I have very few rules, is no fighting. A persons home should be a place of safety and security, not a place where you get hurt or have to endure insults. My kids have to speak nicely to each other and with respect, of course this doesn't always happen but then they are in trouble; #1 rule. Of course this only works if you and your husband speak to each other nicely and with respect.
Don't ever referee your kids. If they are fighting over a toy, take it away from both of them. Don't listen to who did what, if they're fighting they both get a time out. Tell your son if he hates his brother and wishes he was dead those are his feelings, but he's not allowed to verbalise them to his brother because those words are very hurtful and not ok.
A close friend of mine had 3 boys and she wanted to let them fight it out. She soon realized that was a really bad idea.
Answer by onethentwins at 2:51 PM on Apr. 23, 2011
Answer by MunchiesMom324 at 3:47 PM on Apr. 23, 2011