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Can someone help me digest this?

Okay, my nephew lost his dad last Thursday. They weren't close, but he misses him still. I'm so furious right now because the family posted the obituary, and he was survived by one son, and my nephew was not claimed. I'm so hurt right now, and I know his dad would be too if he were here. Should we say something to the family so they can go back in and correct this, or should we just let it go? Help me out on this one please!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:50 AM on Apr. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • I would let it go, this is no time for arguing.

    Answer by older at 8:52 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • I know its no time for arguing, but my nephew is really hurt. What if it were your son? How would you deal with him not being listed as a son in the obituary?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:54 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • I know what you mean, can you make one of your own and add him yourself?

    Answer by older at 8:56 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • I tried to do a memorial site for him, but they're asking a high price for it. I went in to sign the guest book, and I mentioned my nephew as being his son. I wasn't rude, but I acknowledged him as a son, but get this...the family have to approve all guest book signings before their published, and so far mine haven't published yet. I'm so mad right now, because of how their treating my nephew.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:59 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • Let it go. You can always do your own memorial and obit and include him.

    Answer by gemgem at 9:07 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • I would mention it to them. I would bring it to their attention, "WHAT IF....they printers made an error and left the nephew out on accident?"
    You have to stand up for your nephew on something like this. I think it was very thoughtless of whom ever left him out.

    Sorry about your loss.

    Answer by ItsJustMe1017 at 9:09 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • Talk to them about approving yours and explain why

    Answer by older at 9:10 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • 2 questions - How old is your nephew? Does his father's family acknowledge him as part of the family? If he's older than 18, he can speak on his own behalf. Death does strange things to the living. Somehow, it creates something akin to ownership issues over the deceased which is pretty disgusting. It's all part of the process, I suppose, but it's one I can do without. The family arranging the funeral may not feel they are doing anything wrong at all because they included everyone that they felt mattered. Right now I can guarantee that they won't have a clue or a care about how anyone else is feeling. Hope it all works out.

    My father (and my family) wasn't acknowledged when my uncle died (my dad's sister's husband to be clear). It was a pretty glaring omission and there was hurt. It wasn't a deliberate snub though. In their grief, they were incapable of being clear to the funeral home and the right questions weren't asked.

    Answer by Nonoluna at 9:10 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • This is what it said, and I don't think it was a typo. "AB is survived by one son, AB jr. and CS, whom he he raised like a son(my nephew). I don't think this was a mistake.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:13 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

  • My nephew is 24, and the dad's family did acknowledge him.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:14 AM on Apr. 24, 2011

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