Ok so just a vent and I am trying to not let my self esteem get any lower than it is. Why is it that men look at women(and think they are hot, etc) when they look NOTHING like their woman does? I won't say I am a slouch in the looks department. For my age I think I look pretty good. When I met my SO and to this day he does give me compliments and tell me I am hot. A little background, my SO likes looking at naked women (what man doesn't) whether it be in magazines, or online, television, or porn. I am pretty smart when it comes to the computer and I can see the sites etc that he's been viewing. I guess my concern is, he "claims" he's always finding something in all sorts of women that is attractive to him. I can say from seeing his last gf and ex wife that that is sort of true. His last gf was a pretty girl but she was very very heavy, and his ex wife was not a stunner but had a decent body at the time. He claims I am by far the best looking woman he has ever been with. So on that note, how come when I look into the kind of woman he's been looking at, they are all 36-24-36? Perfect bodies, etc etc etc? And I mean everytime!!!!! I cannot help but have this horrid feeling inside me, like I am not good enough. Yes he tells me I am, but if men like him are truely attracted to that "barbie" type, then why the hell are they with women like us? I don't get it. Also the comments that ae said, and I know it's not meant to hurt me, but just commenting on, "Oh shes hot etc" as we're walking etc.....then you look at that fem he was looking at and see that yet again, shes nothing like you. How do you maintain your self esteem when all you see is him oogling over these perfect women? I may seem petty but I cannot help it anymore. My SO is one of those men who is looking, esp online more than occasionally and I normally do not try to be upset about this, but when it seems to be getting more and more, and you see what he's looking at, I cannot help but feel like I am not good enough. Why do they do this? Why do they make it seem like that's what they like? And if so, why the hell are they not with that type? I know I am going on and on, but this is really starting to affect me, and yes I have tried talking to him about this, and he just says hes looking and that he loves me to no end and I am his woman. Its just hard to feel good about myself when I see he's attracted to that.
Then he sits and wonders why I am killing myself to diet and lose more weight? Gee, get a clue.......I just wish it seemed he was truely happy with what he has in me and had no need to keep peering at women constantly. Is that too much to ask?
Thanks for reading, I just had to get this off my chest. Feeling so low this morning after logging on and yet again seeing some random woman he had to take a peek at this morning before he left for work. My self esteem just is pityful right now and I feel aweful inside.
Asked by Anonymous at 6:17 AM on Apr. 25, 2011 in Relationships
Answer by judimary at 6:26 AM on Apr. 25, 2011
Men are visual creatures and I know mine looks but never when I'm with him. Sometimes it feels like a no win situation. If you look that good then he's pissed because other men are checking you out but if you don't look that good then he's looking elsewhere. BS if you ask me!
Answer by darter at 6:42 AM on Apr. 25, 2011
Answer by Autumn07 at 7:11 AM on Apr. 25, 2011
Answer by angelbritnee at 9:08 AM on Apr. 25, 2011
Answer by CollinsMommy729 at 12:00 PM on Apr. 25, 2011