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What's your take on this 'parental advice'?

I just over heard a father gving advice about school life to his child, his exact words were "nobody's looking out for you except you, even the adults. If somebody tells you to do something and you don't think it seems right, you don't have to do it...Nobody there care's about you, you're just another kid to them..."

I understand that I didn't hear the exact context of the conversation but IMO that advice seems a little harsh, and perhaps even jaded...Don't we want our children to feel like they can TRUST the adults in their everyday lives? And to feel like they matter to the world?

What do you think?

Answer Question
 
sbenbenek

Asked by sbenbenek at 9:44 AM on Apr. 25, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 13 (1,256 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Seems like the dad has been snubbed in the past. Yes, I wouldn't tell my kids that...

    Did he mean it in a harsh way? Hmmmmmmmm....

    Not sure what to say.
    ItsJustMe1017

    Answer by ItsJustMe1017 at 9:47 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • It dosnt seem harsh to me. Seems right on target to me. Life IS harsh! People ARE cruel, and in todays schools the teachers seem absent where an individual child is concerned. It seems to be a herd mentality and collecting a paycheck to the teachers today.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 9:47 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • With out knowing the situation or the age of the child it's hard to know exactly what he was trying to convey.
    Liamsmom09

    Answer by Liamsmom09 at 9:48 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • maybe that last part you quoted seems harsh, but i think the rest is pretty much reality. i've always told my son/nephews is something seems wrong to them, really wrong not just something they find boring or too lazy to do, then stand their ground. if they got in trouble for not doing something as commanded by an adult, we'd deal with it. the thing is, what seems 'wrong' to my 6yo and what IS 'wrong' to a 16yo can be completely different things.
    so in a big way, it depends on the age of the child. trust is earned, not something that comes automatically because someone is the adult in the room.
    dullscissors

    Answer by dullscissors at 9:48 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I agree although I also know that sometimes the school doesn't always look out for kids. My son was getting bullied at one point and the school never really did anything. I did tell my son if the kids hit him again he could hit the kids back. I knew he would get in trouble at school "which he did" although he did not get in trouble at home.

    I usually tell my children that they have to listen to their teachers and if they don't agree with something they can tell me about it and we will work it out.

    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 9:48 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • That's really sad that people tell their kids things like that. I can tell you when I worked in the school system I did care about those kids, and I still have contact with several of them (not in a creepy kind of way, in the fact that they are in my scout troop).
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 9:48 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I hate to say it but I'm kinda with the guy on this one. Yes, its nice to be able to trust adults. No, you can't always trust adults, even teachers unfortunately. If an adult told my daughter something that sounded unreasonable, id expect her to use her brain and make her own decision. If it doesn't seem right, don't do it. Exactly.
    emmyandlisa

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 9:49 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • If somebody tells you to do something and you don't think it seems right, you don't have to do it

    i agree with this line ^ and i have told my son the exact same thing.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:49 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • yeah i woudln't tell my kids that no one is looking out for him but him b/c he may start to think about it that way at home. It kinda seems like dad has some deep seeded resentment about his school years and maybe needs to address that. He probably thought he was helping but didn't realize how it came out to the child.
    amberpaiz

    Answer by amberpaiz at 9:53 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • Sadly it is pretty true. Alot of people are just looking out for themselves and are just play cruel. I don't know how old the boy was but dad's alot of times are alot more blunt to their sons then mothers are. I think it's that "man to man" relationship lol
    June_Mama09

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 9:56 AM on Apr. 25, 2011

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