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DS was sent to the office today for what could be considered sexual harrasment and all I got was a 2 sentence note...

For those who don't know DS is 6 and has Asperger's/ Apparently he was sent to the office today because he got upset that a girl was going to tell on him so he started to yell and grab at her to get her to stop. Unfortunately he got a hold of her on her pants int he crotch area. *I* know that he meant nothing sexual by it. This is just how he reacts, yelling and grasping, when he panics. We are all working on it. I know he ended up in the office but I don't know if he went there in his own or if his response team was called to take him. I don't know what was said to the little girl or if her parents were notified with all the details. I know if my DD came home and all I got was a boy touched me I would be livid. I had no phone call just a note saying 'Today in PE Mr. S--- had to send Carl to the office because he grabbed a little girl's pants in the private area.' I am guessing nothing will come of it but all I can think is if I was that girls mom and got no details I would be angry!  DO you think the school handled this well?

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But_Mommie

Asked by But_Mommie at 7:18 PM on Apr. 25, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 44 (181,635 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I would be calling the school or going to the principals office asap tomorrow
    June_Mama09

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 7:20 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I emailed the teacher but I won't hear back until tomorrow I just wondered what everyone else thought...
    But_Mommie

    Comment by But_Mommie (original poster) at 7:21 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I would go to the office and find out what is going on. Autism or not he needs to learn not to touch other kids. One day another child may not react nicely and your son will end up hurt. I know my daughter would have knocked him out. Yes she is six but she also knows that no one has the right to touch her body and she has been taught to protect it. I also know if she went to one of her older brothers and told them what happened... that she was touched they wouldn't take to kindly to it either. They are her protectors, as they should be.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:22 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I'm not stupid. He is well aware of private parts and not to touch. His problem isn't that he was being nasty it's that he was panicked and reacted how he reacts. He had consequences for his outburst and we talked about it more at home.
    But_Mommie

    Comment by But_Mommie (original poster) at 7:24 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I think the school could have handled it better, and I would ask for a conference between you, the principal and the parent(s) of the girl, just to make sure there are NO misunderstandings.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 7:35 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I would go ahead and go in. Show your concern for the other child and ask for more details... you need more details in order to handle the situation and let them know you are MORE than open and WANT TO KNOW exactly what happened etc. when there is a situation with your ds.
    G.L.
    MamiJaAyla

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 8:40 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • I agree with MamiJaAyla. I would let them know that I wanted to know and was concerned about what happened.
    bether89

    Answer by bether89 at 12:45 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I worked in a school up until recently and, in most situations, they CAN'T give either you or the other person very many details, for privacy. However I have heard of this kind of thing happening A LOT with children on the autism spectrum especially. Where I worked we taught kids by having a paper cut-out of a person's body, with different areas colored differently. "Friendly" areas that are okay to touch sometimes during a hug, holding hands, playing, etc, are green... and private areas are RED. If he learns this consistently, then HOPEFULLY in the heat of the moment he will still remember to avoid touching red zones! I think the school should NOT handle this like any type of sexual matter, and if they do talk to the little girl's parents they should make it clear that it was a random, haphazard thing, not a serious attempt to touch her in a specific way.
    NickiKidsOnGo

    Answer by NickiKidsOnGo at 6:48 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

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