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Any Bisexuals feel its difficult being bi sometimes? adult content

Right now, I just don't have the time to add a girlfriend into the mix of my life, but I wish I did. I feel like a part of me is missing without a girlfriend. My SO is awesome don't get me wrong. I love him too death, but since I'm bi, he can't offer me everything I want & need and the sucky part is ... neither can a woman. It's not the sex at all to be honest. It's the mental & emotional connection that a woman offers me. I have that with my SO, but he's a man, so it's not the same as a woman. If I was just with a woman, I wouldn't be fully happy either. I'd be wanting & needing at mental & emotional connection with a man. Being bi is so hard sometimes. I'm proud of who I am and that I'm bi, but sometimes its just so hard that I wish I was straight. I wish I could just have those feelings & desires for ONLY a man. I have an amazing man. Our relationship is awesome & I can't wait to marry him, but I'm not whole. He accepts this part of me & knows I'm struggling with this right now. I just don't have the time to start another relationship. I have more important things to do & put my full self into. A girlfriend has to wait. Point Blank! Ugh !

Any other bisexuals feel this way ? How do I cope with this ? I feel like I won't ever be able to.....

Oh p.s. Bash all you want ! LOL :)

 
loudnproud87

Asked by loudnproud87 at 7:49 AM on Apr. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,730 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I understand what you're saying. I absolutely LOVE my husband, but if we never had sex again it wouldn't bother me. I prefer women for sex, but I tend to prefer men when it comes to companionship. What's more is I can't stand the "you aren't bi, you married a man" shit that my grandmother gives me when we fight over the fact that I'm okay with my children being gay (should they be). And unfortunately that's an argument that comes up regularly because she is convinced I need to train them to be straight.

    But really, what I think it comes down to is learning to be happy with what we have. It's a "love the one you're with" kind of situation.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 8:46 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • im not bi nor a lesbian so i guess im out of my element here, even though i have many gay friends =)

    this might be a stupid silly question buuut doesnt it get tiring having a boyfriend/husband, kids AND a girlfriend? lol

    LovinMyJay4

    Answer by LovinMyJay4 at 9:41 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Thanks so much for bashing, lol I know there will be women out there that do bc I'm keeping this post up but I really appreciate the advice bc that's what I am looking for :)

    I believe 100% you can't train someone to be straight. Not possible. Their brain works that way. ya know ? Yeah my grandma is anti gay too & it annoys the crap outta me! I prefer companionship with both & sex with both. Women offer things in the bed room men can't offer & men offer things in the bed room women can't offer. They also offer things companionship wise that one another can't. If that makes sense ? LOL Having a my bf (soon to be dh LOL), my son & a gf isn't tiring at all. Just I don't have time for all 3 right now. I only have time for the 2 and barely that. I'm in school full time & working part time. I don't really have time for a gf right now!!
    loudnproud87

    Comment by loudnproud87 (original poster) at 10:08 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • It doesn't get tiring bc both have SOOOO much to offer & enjoy having both. It isn't a job for me to keep both going. It just happens naturally. Just right now, with everything going on, I won't have the time to share my self between all 3 of them, school & work.
    loudnproud87

    Comment by loudnproud87 (original poster) at 10:10 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • If its not the sex you want you may be able to find that mental and emotional relationship with another woman easier if you drop the whole she has to be my gf aspect. Once you are married and especially with kids people assume you are heterosexual despite your past, your desires or your own orientation you and your SO know that is you. Straight gay or bi we all are not lucky enough to find another person who makes us 100% whole and I feel like finding my wholeness in myself is more meaningful for me. I hope you can find art, literature, film and conversations to validate the bisexual part of you. Committing to another does not erase who you are at your core. I hope you can find peace.
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 10:12 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • The thing is its hard to find that without the woman being bi as well bc I tend to treat the friendship like a relationship even if it isn't if I feel that emotionally & mental connection with her. If the woman isn't bi, it scares them away bc they know I am. I've tried trying to find it in more of a friendship way before, sadly, it doesn't work bc I ended up treating it like a relationship minus the sex. I've also had a hard time finding bi women that are actually wanting the companionship. All the bi women I've talked to, want the sex more than anything. I'm very lucky to find such an amazing man like I did! I didn't mean to come off sounding like I don't appreciate him. I do very much so. Just I long for that companionship with a woman. The sex right now doesn't really concern me. I just need that connection that touch of a woman in a non sexual way. if that makes sense ? I completely accept myself & I know who I am
    loudnproud87

    Comment by loudnproud87 (original poster) at 10:19 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • No it does make sense and you weren't dissing your relationship at all. I see from your profile you from Columbus I am sure Ohio State has some excellent support groups maybe even a dedicated bi women's group
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 10:24 AM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Hmm.. that's a good idea. I never thought about getting into a support group for my sexuality. Maybe I'll give that a try ? Thanks Jamesonjustines!! i appreciate the support & advice!
    loudnproud87

    Comment by loudnproud87 (original poster) at 10:28 AM on Apr. 26, 2011