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3 Bumps

I live with my mom, I have a girl that is 3 and her behaivor is getting out of control with me. she does not listen to me or thinks she has to do what i say, My mom always butts in makes me feel like i am such a bad parent and her way is the only right way. what can i do its making me nutts

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mickey09

Asked by mickey09 at 3:45 PM on Apr. 26, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Move out.
    Candi1024

    Answer by Candi1024 at 3:46 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Candi beat me to it. Move out. Your mother won't change.
    CallMeAngie

    Answer by CallMeAngie at 3:48 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I'm guessing the poster doesn't have the option, or it isn't available to her yet.

    Other suggestions?
    cheekycherub

    Answer by cheekycherub at 3:48 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • have you tried talking w/your mother? Letting her know (nicely) that her interfering is frustrating and isn't helping your daughter to mind you.

    Good luck!
    cheekycherub

    Answer by cheekycherub at 3:49 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I really see only 3 options. 1. You need to make it very clear to your child. YOU ARE THE PARENT, NOT YOUR MOTHER, YOU MAKE THE RULES. YOU NEED TO START MAYBE START PUTTING SOME CONSEQUENCES TO HER ACTIONS. 2. You need to politely, appreciatively , tell your mom that you appreciate her help , but she can help by letting you handle the child alone, and she needs to stay out of it when she is dealing with your child. 3. the last option is that you will have to move out is she wont keep out of your business. That child needs one authority, she cant afford to be confused. Take it from someone who now doesnt have a relationship with her daughter and doesnt see her grandson. DONT LET IT GET SO BAD YOU AND YOUR MOTHER BREAK UP AND NEVER TALK AGAIN AND YOUR MOTHER LOSES THE BOTH OF YOU
    mythreegems

    Answer by mythreegems at 3:51 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Its because of that reason she is acting out - you BOTH need to be on the same page.. or your mom needs to butt out... and if she doesnt, it will not get better. She, like all kids need consistency
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 3:51 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Tell your mom that you will raise your daughter and she needs to stop trying to take control/over. Nothing will accomplish that faster than moving out with your daughter into a place of your own. It's easy for us to fall right back into the parenting role if the child is in our house 24/7 and we are taking care of her for any length of time during the day.

    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 3:53 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I think you need to take you mom aside and have an adult to adult conversation with her letting her know how you feel and what you want and what you are going to do. that she does not have to agree with it but she should at least give you that respect.
    "Move out" is such a cop out answer, things are easier said than done and we do not know the circumstances. I apologise for their indecency.
    alainalee

    Answer by alainalee at 3:54 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I've been in your situation!!! Me and my dad always butt heads when I was trying to parent. We got into a lot of fights about it. My suggestion.....have a talk with her and say Please, let me be the parent. I am trying my best. You can give me advice here and there but don't override my decisions.

    It's worth a shot. It's really hard to be in your position...I couldn't take it anymore so I went to college and moved out. GL!
    Keeely07

    Answer by Keeely07 at 3:57 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • its not that easy for me to move out, for money reasons and 2nd my mom is sick , so i take care of the house and things like that and my sister recently passed 2 months ago and shes not been the same since , but we have been here since i was pregnant they added on to the house for me and her. but its to the point i am always stressed, i have talked to her many times so many times and she refuses to respect that i am a mom and need to be one, shes always been negative in my life plus she smokes and my girl her to be on a breathing machine when she is sick like now. i would love to just stay up in our attic but she dont always wanna go up there. i just feel like i have no support her father does not experience this with her cause hes not with her all the time and dont see her how she is with me. if i even say no she goes running the other way. talking to my mom has not helped.
    mickey09

    Comment by mickey09 (original poster) at 4:04 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

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