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? reguarding child molestation

My best friend's dd (age 3) was molested. She told her mom that her 5yr old cousin licked her privates. My best friend called CPS. Both little girls were interviewed, and both admitted that someone told them to touch and kiss each other's privates. Neither child will name the offender because they were threatened. So CPS has closed the case. Now my best friend's dd is acting out; peeing on the floor, taking off her brother's diaper, and constantly playing with her privates. CPS said that she is too young to see a psychologist, and they won't offer any other services. So if anyone else has ever faced this, how did you help your child? What steps do you take if CPS does nothing? They will not investigate anyone until the girls give a name, and the parents have been ordered not to question the kids. I don't know where to go from here. All I know is that 2 little girls are suffering and no one knows how to help them.

 
bestmommyeber

Asked by bestmommyeber at 3:17 PM on Dec. 3, 2008 in Kids' Health

Level 9 (351 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • She is not too young to see a therapist depending on her developmental level and cognitive functioning. I worked with children and trauma. Take this information and remember it: Forensic interviewer. They are trained specifically to work with young children to see if her signs/symptoms/descriptions are consistant with sexual abuse. If you haven't called your local sexual assault center then do so. If you live in a small town, contact the next largest town that has access to more professionals in the community. Until then you at least know that something is very off. Watch the girls at play. Never leave them alone to play by themselves. It is called sexually reactive behavior when children act out abuse on each other. You may trust all the adults but obviously someone did something. So you can't trust 100% all those around your child. Be realistic. Be safe and smart for her sake.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 4:47 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Wow. That is horrible. What right does CPS have to tell the parents they cannot talk to their kids?!? I'd be talking to them constantly in a non-threatening manner to try to figure out what is going on. I would also be inclined to keeping my kids home until I found out what the heck was going on. Someone in their lives is abusing them. Find out who it is, whatever it takes.
    feesharose

    Answer by feesharose at 3:22 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Oh, that's just awful. Wish I had an answer, but thankful I don't have experience i guess.
    sfwilson

    Answer by sfwilson at 3:32 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Well, first of all, if CPS told me they wouldn't investigate, I'd tell them to shove it up their you know what when they order me not to talk to my child about it! But, moving on to the actual point of your question, I'd take my child to their ped, explain what happened, and get them to tell me what we could do to help my child. When my son was about 3 I suspected that his father had molested him a yr or so before based on something my ex said. When I went to the ped, he said b/c of the time that had passed and that my son was acting fine, that it would be more traumatic to try to find out. But, he also said that if my son had been acting out or showing signs of abuse/memories of it, then he would have referred us for play therapy. He said they would have dolls and such, and a therapist would have worked with my son to try to find out what did/didn't happen. Hope that helps some.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 4:04 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • it is a very hard situation when the child is so young but you need to find a therapist who works with young children...CPS is copping out...they dont want to do the hard work....I had to find a good child therapist when my babysitter molested my 5 yr old...he was prosecuted with just her accounting and from what the therapist was able to say for her in court...she will always remember that I stood up for her thru the hard times and believed her...those girls need that too...you can help them by saying to CPS that they need to do their job...there are always supervisors above everyone who works for CPS...TALK to them....get personal with them...make them help the girls....it IS possible to do so....good luck
    Aidans_nana

    Answer by Aidans_nana at 3:16 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • That is horrible I hope who is responsible can be put away! the girls are so young who are they in contact with it can't be to many people it is someone close to them I am sure. the mother needs to protect her kids and build a trust with them so they can feel safe in telling for now NO ONE should be in contact with these kids other then the MOM she needs to do what it takes to get them away from everyone until this is solved!

    I have a 3 year old and a 5 year old and they do not see anyone with out me there, I do not trust anyone and in your freinds case everyone is a suspect!!!!

    CPS sucks and we wonder why people take matters into there own hands!!!
    Joanne27

    Answer by Joanne27 at 11:52 AM on Dec. 10, 2008

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