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2 Bumps

Have you ever thought that maybe your partner is doing too much to discipline your child?

My son gets spanked a lot when his dad is home for literally everything he does (jumping on the bed/couch, making a mess in the bathroom, not sitting up straight at the table he gets pinched). He intervenes when he thinks my son is not listening to me, and just go ahead and spanks him. If not spanking, he just yells at my son for doing something he did not like.

Answer Question
 
filmom2ethan

Asked by filmom2ethan at 8:28 PM on Apr. 26, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 11 (608 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • Why are you allowing it?
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 8:30 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • daddy needs to learn about giving warnings. Also read a book on what is and is not age appropriate.
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 8:31 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • oh - on a plus side, kiddo is likely going to take warnings from daddy very seriously. I do spank on rare occasions.... never for couch jumping though. I try and be more practical. On the rare occasion my kids jumped on the couch they were banned from it and had to sit on the floor.
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 8:32 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Stop him! Do not let him continue to hurt that child.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 8:33 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • Daddy needs a time out! What does he expect for the kid not to move? There is a difference between teaching him and discipline. Instead he should show him how to sit at the table instead of pinching him. Make him clean up when he makes the mess.
    JayRo00

    Answer by JayRo00 at 8:34 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • And yes I agree with hibbingmom, make him sit on the floor if he jumps on the couch. I do that with my kids and they stop jumping.
    JayRo00

    Answer by JayRo00 at 8:36 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I would tell him he needs to calm down. you two need to sit down and go over the ground rules!
    June_Mama09

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 8:36 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I repeatedly tells him everyday to just choose his battles, and yes, give warnings, but still to no avail. I even tell him that if he continues, he's bound to have a heart attack from getting too stressed when he's home. It seems to me that he needs help with talking to kids and I always feel that he had a disability from childhood that was not paid attention to(he grew up with grandma).
    filmom2ethan

    Comment by filmom2ethan (original poster) at 8:39 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • I think sometimes my DH can go a little over board with the discipline but I don't mind. It seems like we are surrounded by children that scream at their parents and tell them no and throw tantrums and every one of them get away with it. Our daughter used to do all these things until her daddy set her straight a few times and now we hardly have to worry about her being bad. Yeah she throws the occasional tantrum when she can't get a sweet but thats it. I know everyone has their own method of dealing with a child and ours seems to be working fine for us.
    Yes kids need to be treated like kids and I admit I let my daughter get away with some things she shouldn't. But bottom line is if a kid is jumping on the bed the should be scolded IMO b/c that could cause injury or break the bed!
    I don't think your husband is trying to be a meanie, I think he's trying to teach your son the be a fine gentlemen they only way he knows how.
    PrettyGirlRedd

    Answer by PrettyGirlRedd at 9:54 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

  • my son gets really no disapline from his dad... shoot he has his dad wrapped around his fingers... it's mainly me doing it and he gets time outs on his bed with nothing to do... oh yeah and for him that is harsh
    lynnlang

    Answer by lynnlang at 10:15 PM on Apr. 26, 2011

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