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3 Bumps

Why she annoy me like this?

I got an old friend...she only talk about old stuff or the not so good things in her life. She doesn't give insight to anything new or fun. Her memory of me is when I was 18-20 I'm not 27 with a kid. She is 90% the same as when I left...I'm no where near the same like 30%.

She annoyes me cause when we talk about stuff she is giving me the answer I "want to hear" versus what she really thinks and feels. Hate that. IDK she is liek the annoying little sister I never wanted.

Should I just keep my mouth shut and be aware that she is "fake" or delete her contact?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:42 AM on Apr. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Sounds like the 2 of you are just in 2 different places in your lives. You might want to consider that she may feel like she can't really relate to your life now and that is why she talks about the past. She may be telling you what she thinks you "want to hear" because she is afraid that if she upset you with her opinion then you may not come around. Her baggage may be very heavy and you may not want to carry it. I wouldn't say delete...maybe step back and take a breath.
    sipn_mom

    Answer by sipn_mom at 7:55 AM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • i would just spend as little time as you can with her. I know some of my friends haven't changed over the last 20 years either but thats why i don't allow them in my life and just keep it casual on Facebook. They USED to be my best friends but not anymore in this day and age.

    This reminds me of the time one of my friends had pointed out that my sister knew him as he was back then (20+years ago, no kids and still in high school) and not who he is now...with 3 kids and an ex wife, which was weird for me to hear cause it took me a while to figure out what he meant but it made sense cause she didn't want to accept who he is now since she seems to be partying like she was 18 all the time when she is almost 30 now with 3 kids. Some pple dont like change.

    no need to have friends who can't accept who have become now. Just say your busy with things in your life now.
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 8:10 AM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • People change (or not) and grow apart sometimes as time goes by...if you're having trouble relating, then just keep the friendship at arm's length. No need to be involved in one another's day-to-day lives if you no longer share common ground, but you don't necessarily have to cut her off completely either. I have plenty of old friends I keep in touch with online, but we don't hang out in real life anymore. There's no hard feelings, just a lot of time and distance between us.
    vicesix

    Answer by vicesix at 8:14 AM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • Sounds like there is nothing you really like or get from this friendship so why do you keep her as a friend. Friendships end for a variety of reasons. They all do not last our lifetime.

    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 8:33 AM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I have experienced this so many times, I am 25 , an army wife with 5 kids, and my past "friends" like to compare our lives based on the past. I simply quit speaking with them! I am better than that! So are you!
    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 8:56 AM on Apr. 27, 2011

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