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Mixed emotions... how do you feel about this???

I love that my 16 yr old daughter feels comfortable enough to have her friends over. I love that they are here. I dont mind the noise (too much), I dont mind the chaos (too much), I dont mind feeding them (too much)..... but I get a huge knott in my stomach when they open the fridge and just help themselves.

Part of me is happy that they feel comfortable enough... the other part of me thinks it is damned rude to do.

If they said "Mrs. Smith do you mind if I grab a snack?" Id feel a whole lot better about it.

what are your thoughts????


Asked by Anonymous at 8:20 PM on Apr. 27, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • That's teenagers. When all my teenage nieces come by, they don't ask, they just eat. I feel the same way you do, but i guess it's a teenage thing. GOOD LUCK. And I know her friends think that you are the coolest mom in the world.

    Answer by yummysmummy at 8:23 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I even love that they help themselves out of my fridge. I've even had teens let themselves in my house just to use my bathroom. The only thing I wont stand for is if they don't clean up after themselves. I say "are you guys waiting for the dish fairy to put those dishes in the dishwasher for you" and if that doesn't work I give them a nice friendly lecture on respect. lol they hate that.

    It just makes me so happy that my house is the go-to teen hangout. I always know where my kids are there and what they are up to. I love teenagers.


    Answer by onethentwins at 8:29 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • Amen sister! My daughter has one particular friend who eats everything in my house and I don't know how to tell her to stop!

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 8:22 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I had always told my son's friends (when he was a teen and living at home) to make themselves at home and whatever they wanted to eat was free game.

    However. IF I had not ever expressed that to my son's friends and they just made themselves at home to the food in our house. I would probably get a bit peeved about it. In that case, I would either let them all know : Feel free to have whatever.. or... Please ask me first and then you can have whatever.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 8:25 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • How horribly rude. Speak with your daughter about it. Just tell her that while you enjoy her friends being there, you'd love it if they did not help themselves to your food supply.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 8:27 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I agree. That's rude

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:29 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • No, I don't think you should pin it on your daughter like someone was saying for you to talk to her. That puts your daughter under a lot of stress.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 8:37 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I totally agree. I have always thought that was rude. When I was that age even when I felt comfortable at a friend's house I never would have done that, my mom would have killed me if I had LOL. I think I would definitely speak to your daughter and have pass onto her friends that they need to ask before just grabbing food. I think you could also tell them yourself.

    Answer by cowboysgirl3227 at 8:37 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I totally agree. It's not their home & they should ask that's being polite.

    Answer by sarasmommy777 at 8:38 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I have discovered two type of teens, boorish, impolite dim-wits who have never been properly trained by their parents and those who have. Either ask your daughter to speak with her friends or post a note on your fridge. Better yet, pre-make and set out a few snacks that will curb the urge to raid your fridge & employ the help of your daughter for drinks, etc. in their presence-let her do the fridge raiding.
    Help your daughter to help them see that this is your home, your fridge, and they are GUESTS! Remind your guests-"let me do that!"
    MY kids are so busy with school and sports---home is a respite---their friends are rarely here---my kids like their private down time...and so do I.

    Answer by Zeldana at 8:20 AM on Apr. 29, 2011