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2 Bumps

Marrying a pushover

My fiance has always been a sweetheart to me and everyone he knows. Anything you asked of him he'd do it, no questions asked. Unfortunately now this has become a problem in our relationship and it is getting out of hand, because more so than not, he is being taken advantage of by people, and with myself being 7 months pregnant, I have become very frustrated with this that it has began to stress me out. In the past he has been taken advantage by nearly everyone; ex's, parents, siblings, and friends, so of course when I came along and opened his eyes, no one was happy about me. His parents tricked him into buying a house only to have to move his mom and brother in when his parents split, and now they wont leave. So with us expecting our second child, our house is full to capacity that we're having to move. He supports his mom who is twice our age, she works full time and pays no bills, and at the end of the month his brother is moving his girlfriend and her baby in. I'm so frustrated, this is not an apartment building, no one expects to pay anything, they're all just living off of us (because I of course pay bills buy groceries and what not) and he's too 'nice' to say anything to them because if he does they'll curse him out, physically attack him or something of the sort, so his solution is we'll just move. I have told him this wont solve anything they'll just screw up and ask to move in again. I'm tired of feeling like he has 4 kids besides our own. He can never help me with anything for the baby or we can never afford to go out to dinner because 'the electric bill was so high he has to save money to get caught up' when he could simply tell everyone to help out. I dont know what to do, I'm happy I have a sweet guy but that doesnt mean be a doormat to everyone.

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:01 PM on Apr. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • u need to talk to him when ur mouth is full and your nekkid and tell him what to do !!!!!!

    Answer by wawamom at 9:05 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • You will have to step up and be the WOMEN that you are and put your foot down and say look this will stop

    Answer by SCOOKIH at 9:14 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • read him the story about when you give a mouse a cookie, they will come back for milk. everyone's gotta learn how to saw NO!
    also, maybe motivate him by asking where he would spend all the money other than on his family or electricity. say WOULDNT YOU RATHER GO TO THE BAHAMAS!?

    Answer by Liz4Life at 9:14 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I think I'd be packing everyone's stuff up, having a locksmith out to the house, change all the locks, keep the ONLY copy to yourself (no, I wouldn't give it to hub cuz he might give it to them), and put their stuff out on the porch (or yard, w/e).

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 9:17 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • I think his being a doormat is forcing you to be a doormat to live in your own home. I would be ready to say "them or me". There is no way I would want to continue to support a bunch of grown adults when it is hard enough to start out a life, marriage, and family as it is.

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 9:21 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

  • talk to him,maybe he doesnt see it because they are his family?tell them they need to be gone within a week or you will be,Im sure his mum can figure it out

    Answer by mum2flowers at 10:50 PM on Apr. 27, 2011

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