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Am i wrong for wanting to save my relationship with my child's father and giving him the altimatium of making it work or not having apart of his sons life?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:01 PM on Dec. 3, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • Yes, of course you're wrong. If its not going to work, its just not going to work. Your relationship with his father and his relationship with his child are two separate issues. You're only hurting the man you're trying to hang onto, and your child.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 6:03 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • I agree with Ginger0104 - if your relationship doesn't workout you will be punishing not your boyfriend but your child. A child should never be used as blackmail or something to bargain with against the other person in a relationship.
    bonn777

    Answer by bonn777 at 6:06 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Am I reading this right? If you can't have a relationship with the father of your child, then you are not going to let him into your son's life? If thats what you are saying, then its wrong.Your son and your son'ts dad have the right to have a life if he is good to him. You shouldn't hold onto any man that way. Wouldn't it make you feel like he is only in your life for the son. Not all people click in life. he can be in his son't life with or without your approval, I hope you know that, especially if he takes it to court.He may pay child support, but, you may also have to let him see him unless there is a reason he shouldn't.
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 6:06 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Yes, you are wrong! You shouldn't be using your son as a TOOL to get what you want from your husband! He is your son' s father . He has as much right to be able to spend time with his son as you do. There is no garantee that you would get custody of your son. You husband could fight you for custody and win.
    amydh

    Answer by amydh at 6:06 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • yes, ultimatums are never okay if you want a healthy adult relationship.
    I will never understand why women continue to bring babies into this world with men they are not already devoted to, married to, and 100% sure that they want to share a child with.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:11 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Careful what you threaten.... he may decide to take you to court and might even win and then you'll be the one hoping he cooperates. I agree with all of the others, never use your child as a weapon, and holding a man that way is just wrong. Sorry
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 6:44 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Yes your relationship with your sons father has nothing to do with his relationship with his father. Just because he no longer wants to be with you does not mean that his relationship with his son should suffer.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 6:48 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • Yes, the person that would be hurt the most by that is your son. Your son is innocent in all of this and shouldn't be used as a pawn. I always say, it is better for a child to see two people happy apart than miserable together.
    a_and_j_momma

    Answer by a_and_j_momma at 6:59 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • I agree. It's wrong and you dont' have the right to keep the child from his dad. The child will end up hating your for using him as a pawn for your own selfishness.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:26 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

  • You are selfish... GROW UP. Your child is a precious blessing and gift... not a tool for you to get your way. What did you do? Tell him you were taking your birth control pills at a lame attempt to trick him into being with you?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:33 PM on Dec. 3, 2008

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