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3 Bumps

They hate my man

Ok, I have a wonderful man. He has a good job, has totally stepped into the parenting role of my 14 year old daughter, he takes me to church-I've seriously have never had it this good nor have I been this happy. The problem is, my sisters and mother don't like him. I honestly think that there is some jealousy-one of my sisters just got out of a 14 year marriage and I have been single for 12 years. I mean, everyone thought I was gonna die alone. His name is Dave and when my mom sees him she goes "hello, David" in a real nasty way. What do I do?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:10 AM on Apr. 28, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Lots of people get uncomfortable when you change the status quo. It makes them take a look at their own situation and when their life is no longer looking better than yours, resentment can occur.

    Know that they're probably jealous deep down...
    GoodyBrook

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 12:21 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Confront them. Ask what there problem is
    nowmommyof2

    Answer by nowmommyof2 at 12:15 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Have you asked them what it is exactly that they do not like about Dave? Try to get them to say what it is exactly they don't like. If you get the old "I don't know, it's just SOMETHING about him I don't like" type response, chances are that there is nothing wrong with him at all in their eyes. In such a case it could be just what you said, they may feel jealous about how happy you are with him. If he makes you happy and is a good father, that may be enough for them not to like him. I'd shield him from them, even if that means having to shut them out of your own life. He sounds like a good man from what you said, don't let their ugliness ruin a good thing for you. Honor him by loving him, and don't let their nasty attitude hurt him.
    pinwheel

    Answer by pinwheel at 12:22 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • They are jealous! Don't allow them to upset you and don't play into their hands! Enjoy your family, life and ignore the words of your mom & sister!
    Kathy675

    Answer by Kathy675 at 12:20 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Sometimes love can be blind. I'm not saying anything bad about your relationship with this guy, if you are happy that is what matters. Sometimes other people can see things you don't. The next time you talk to them, ask them why they can't just be happy for you. If there is something that you don't know but, need to know, tell them to go ahead and tell you. You really need to find out what the problem is.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:47 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Definitely confront them. Do not let them think this kind of behavior is acceptable. If that doesn't work, then cut them out of your life for awhile. They will realize what is really important.
    I believe that they are not only jealous, but they are mad at him for stealing you away from them. You probably used to spend a lot of time with them, and you probably depended on them for advice as well. Im guessing that you don't do that so much anymore. Correct?

    As I said, definitely confront them, but keep in mind what they might be going through as well.
    an-apple-a-day

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 12:21 AM on Apr. 28, 2011


  • If a person decides they do not want to like a person, nothing can change that because they will find fault with everything and more reason to hate, even illogical reasons. Just break company with them and if they ask why , tell them you are not going to subject Dave to their nasty treatment because he's done nothing to deserve it. Tell them Dave would gladly put up with their abusive treatment, but you refuse to ask him too so you won't be visiting.
    CallMeAngie

    Answer by CallMeAngie at 12:24 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I would ask how they feel about him first and why? There has to be a reason why they treat him like that.
    booger14

    Answer by booger14 at 12:24 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • My family, mom, dad & siblings, have never liked my husband. I told them if they want to see me then they need to respect both of us and our marriage. I haven't seen any of them in over 10 years. Their choice. They said our marriage would never last! We just celebrated our 28th anniversary, have 2 beautiful sons (which, by the way, they don't know), he's provided us with a beautiful home and lots of love! I don't need nor do I want their negative aura around us! There loss! I know it hurts but your husband and daughter are your life now and let them brood without you!
    Kathy675

    Answer by Kathy675 at 12:32 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Jealous. Just tell them they need to show you and him some respect.


     


    good luck

    momavanessa

    Answer by momavanessa at 12:46 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

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