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Am I being too strict ?

My son is 3-1/2 and as many are, we are running into battles of listening and respect. He is already strong willed so testing comes with the territory anyway but I am questioning the line of being too strict and not letting him be a child either... We do time outs for back talk and disrespectful words towards us -He gets put in his room for whining fits and throwing his toys or not taking care of his things.. Toys taken after a warning to put them away or not listening.. I don't know.. sometimes I feel scared if we don't allow some sort of back talk or at least an outlet for him to express himself when he's angry, he will find a different way to release those feelings as he gets older in a non productive manner.. My DH says I over think things and we are better to be strict than not.. he does get many chances to be silly and we have so much fun together but I guess I worry what is TOO strict and for what ages.. when he gets upset would having him punch a pillow be a dumb idea?? that's what my sister said I should do for that "boy aggression"


Asked by maxsmom11807 at 10:31 AM on Apr. 28, 2011 in General Parenting

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Answers (4)
  • When my kids were little we talked about their feelings (when they were calm) and how to handle them. Punching a pillow is one of the things they suggested for when they were mad - it's perfectly fine to hit a pillow! I wouldn't tell him to do it, but if he's mad you might want to remind him of a "good choice" for a way to handle that.
    I don't think you are too strict at all. I think it 's much easier to set fairly rigid rules when they are young and then relax them as they grow rather than letting them run wild and trying to rein them in when they are older.

    Answer by missanc at 10:35 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • LOL, I think you are overthinking. Back talk is never encouraged in my house, it's a vital lesson called RESPECT. Too many kids lack that these days. My kids were allowed to throw fits, but they had to do them in their rooms with their doors closed. You are teaching him that he is responsible for his own actions and ever action has a consequence. You are not being too strict.

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 10:35 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I don't think you're being too strict at all! It sounds like you're doing a really great job at disciplining your son. You have to do what is necessary to make sure he learns now that he can't be disrespectful and throwing things around, otherwise he'll turn into more than you can handle as he gets older. You're doing a good job. Trust yourself and what you feel is right for him to learn.

    Answer by jalvarez626 at 10:36 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • you are WAY OVERTHINKING! He is fine!

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 3:11 PM on Apr. 28, 2011